Always been you
by 4evershows
Summary: Place during season 2, one shot NS. What if Serena makes sharing a brother with Dan is a big deal, and turned to Nate. will they find their way to be together? NJBC...
1. Chapter 1

Summary: How will Serena react when she finds out she shares a sibling with Dan? Who will she turn to? This will eventually evolve into SereNate. Mentions of CB and the N-JBC

Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl; if I did, SereNate would be together from the beginning.

_Hello my fellow Upper-East Siders, and my other less regal readers. It's just another rainy day in the city of dreams and another juicy story to tell. The highlights of our day would be Queen __**B**__'s theatrical exit from the Palace hotel, teary eyed and still looking fabulous. Even after hijacking the Bass limo. Take it from us __**C**__, she's a keeper. _

_Oh but we cannot forget our resident 'It' girl, Serena van der Woodsen, she's got a secret to share about her new sibling. Of course when we find out all the details, I'll be sure to keep you posted! _

Spotted: **S** and **N** holding hands and walking towards the Archibald townhouse. Do our eyes deceive us, or are they finally together? Has **S** forgotten **lonely boy** and moved on to better things? Only one way to find out!

_You know you love me,_

_XOXO_

_Gossip Girl_

After Dan confirms the latest Gossip Girl blast is in fact true, she can't believe it. She doesn't want to believe it, so she just gets up and leaves Dan sitting alone on a bench in Central Park. She can't face this right now. How can she face this at all? The man she so desperately loves shares a sibling with her and even Serena knows there are some lines you cannot cross; and this is one of those lines.

She doesn't know who to turn to. Going home would infuriate her further, how could her mother have kept such a secret from her? She cannot run to Blair because Blair has her own problems to deal with concerning the Basshole, her infamous stepbrother. She gets in the limo and tells the driver to drive to Park Avenue, and before she realizes it she's in front of the Archibald's townhouse. Serena sighs, this is absurd! She and Nate aren't even on speaking terms right now, how can she pour her heart out to someone who couldn't care less? But something in her so desperately wants to knock on the door so she settles for a compromise; she sits at the bottom of the steps leading up to the door.

XOXO

She doesn't know how long she sits there in the cold, her legs are covered in goose-pimples and she wishes she chose something a little more appropriate rather than fashionable. Her flimsy Burberry Prorsum trench and DKNY playsuit did not offer much in the way for warmth. She's snapped out of her regretful thoughts by an all too familiar voice.

"Serena?" Nate says, puzzlement clouding his voice. He has just come home from his three month anniversary date with Vanessa and when he spots Serena on his steps, cold and upset, he is worried. There has to be something very wrong for her to come to him. They weren't even on speaking terms these days.

When Serena sees Nate, she just can't hold it in anymore the tears just begin flowing uncontrollably. Nate walks towards Serena and sits beside her, his arm pulling her into his chest so that he can hug her closely. He sees the phone in Serena's hand open on a Gossip Girl blast regarding her and Dan and he remembers the latest news.

"I heard." Nate says quietly, not sure what to do, so he does the only useful thing he can think of: he takes off his jacket and places on Serena's cold legs. It's a small thing but it makes Serena smile nonetheless.

"I'm so sorry Nate. I don't want to bother you with my problems but I just didn't know where to go...Oh God, I knew this was a stupid idea, I mean we don't even talk like we used to..." Serena starts babbling frantically.

But Nate cuts her off. "You know, you can always count on me Serena. And as for the no talking thing? Well we can just start now!"

Serena lays her head in Nate's shoulder and sighs.

"I'm so tired, Nate. My life is confusing and I don't know who to go to half the time." She begins crying again and her tears soak Nate's Ralph Lauren shirt wet, but he don't even realize because he's too consumed by the worry of Serena's mental state.

Giving her shoulder a squeeze, he then pulls apart and invites her into the house. He grabs her hand and they walk up the stairs together and make their way into the grand townhouse towering before them.

"Everything looks the same here." Serena says when she looks around Nate's room. Serena walks around his room, stopping every now and then when she spots something that reminds her of her childhood spent at Nate's home when her mother was off jetting the world. Occasionally she would pick things up and stare intently at them. Whilst Nate was making his bed for Serena to lie in, Serena spots something especially memorable. She picks it up and turns to face Nate with a loving expression that was tainted with surprise.

"You still have this doll?" She says, holding up the rabbit doll for Nate to see.

Nate looks Serena and smiles.

"Of course, that was the first time I ever received a Valentine's Day present. You remember?"

Serena smiles too, how can she forget? It was the day Serena declared her undying love for a boy and gave Nate a doll and a kiss on the cheek.

"Do you still remember what you said to me?" Nate asks laughing at the memory.

Serena nods. "Oh yeah, it was the first time I declared my love for any guy!"

"Oh and it was also the first time I ever proposed to any girl." Nate says laughing with Serena as they reminisced on events long gone.

Serena's expression turned sombre almost as quickly as she had begun laughing.

"What happened to us, Nate? We used to be so close."

Nate walks toward Serena, the smile on his face long gone too.

"It's called growing up Serena, people drift apart over time."

"I hate growing up." Serena says sadly, her eyes tearing up once again.

Nate holds Serena closely and guides her to his bed. Serena lies down in his bed and kicks back the covers; she pats a space next to her and slides over to give Nate some room.

"Come and lie down next to me Natie, tell me a bedtime story like old times" She says, her face tear stained and eyes so red and sad, he cannot possibly refuse.

He knows it's wrong and that he has a girlfriend, but this is his friend. A friend who he has known since infanthood and who has shared most of his memories with him.

She curls her toes, and snuggles in closer to his chest, relishing the warmth and signature scent of the sandalwood soap that his maid always stocked in his bathroom. For once in a very long time, she felt as though she was home.

As he lay next to Serena, her distinctive fresh floral smell taking over, his heart ached. He loved this girl lying next to her, and one of the only reasons he hadn't been speaking to her was because he thought his heart would end up broken. Turns out, he didn't need to speak to her for that to happen, all he had to do was look. She was everything he wanted, but could never have.

As though they were 15 again, she intertwined her legs with his, their bodies a mess of limbs and she rest her head on his chest. She needed this and she couldn't help herself. They lay there, the silence taking over. Nate couldn't help but think that the silence was deafening and that maybe they should be speaking, but before his thought is even finished he can hear Serena's light snores and sighs. She really was tired. He just stared at her tranquil features unable to look away and he doesn't really know how long he stared, but somewhere along the line he falls asleep, his cheek resting on her head.

XOXO

His cell-phone ringing awakens him from his peaceful slumber and he groans. Something always has to ruin the moment. He props himself up with his elbow, careful not to disturb Serena and leans forward to pick the phone up off the side.

"Hello?" Nate answers groggily, puzzled as to who would call him this early in the morning.

"Nate." He can hear Blair's concerned voice. "I just read the latest Gossip Girl blast about Serena and Dan. I couldn't find Serena, she must be devastated, although I'm not sure why. It is cabbage patch she is losing, not much really. Is she with you?"

Nate wants to leave and speak somewhere else where he won't disturb Serena, but even the slightest movement scares him. He doesn't want her to burst into another round of tears, leave him and run to Blair.

"Errmm, yeah but she's asleep. How did you know she was with me?" Nate all but whispers.

"Gossip Girl's 'spotted' column. I'm not quite sure when you two started speaking but I guess she had to turn to someone whilst I was busy with my drama..." Blair says uncertainly.

"Problems with the Basstard?" Nate says knowingly.

"That mother Chucker needs to get a grip! I don't even want anything to do with him anymore!" Blair says angrily.

"What's the problem this time?"

"The only problem is him!"

Nate shakes his head before realizing that Blair can't see him before saying something to cover up his stupidity.

"You know Blair, you and Chuck need to sort out your issues. You two always end up together anyways. Just save yourself and everyone around you and make up with the Basstard."

"I'll bet he pays you to say this. Either way I'm not having this conversation because I'm done with him!" Blair says before adding something about her best friend to signal that the conversation is definitely over. "I'm glad Serena is with you, she needs a good friend and in my state, I'd probably drive her to the point of insanity"

"Don't worry. I'll stay with her." Nate promises honestly.

After he hangs up, he finds a way of getting out of bed without disturbing Serena, putting a pillow under her head, and leaves the room in search of a change of clothes for Serena and breakfast.

After asking the cook to prepare pancakes, waffles and omelettes, he walks around the house in search of his mother before finding her in the dining room eating her breakfast and planning some society event.

"Morning Mom." Nate says, kissing his mother's cheek.

"Morning honey, I heard Serena is here? The maids could never keep secrets." Anne says smiling.

"Yeah. I hope that's okay. She's still asleep." Nate answers sheepishly.

"Oh darling, don't be so ridiculous. Why would there be a problem? I've always loved Serena as though she was my own daughter, regardless; she used to stay here all the time so I don't see why things have to change now. Not to mention I know you have a crush on her." Anne says with a knowing look on her face.

"Yeah, but that was a long time ago" Nate answers subconsciously because it's the truth although hidden by a tiny white lie, because he still does have a crush on her.

Anne looks at him with a bright smile on her face "So you did have a crush on her!"

Nate blushes and reminds his mother of his girlfriend, Vanessa and that he couldn't do that to her.

"Honestly Nathaniel, that girl isn't the right match for you. I don't know what you see in that low class hippie anyways."

"Mom! She's my girlfriend and I like her. Even you said you thought she was lovely" Nate said defensively.

Anne looks Nate again. "I haven't forgotten. She is a lovely girl. But just as a friend, you have nothing in common with her! She's an artistic, hippie type who lives in Brooklyn. You absolutely hate art, you live on the Upper East Side and might well be the opposite of a hippie."

Nate just wants to debate this, but Anne cuts him off even before he can begin

"Nate, you're young. You can be friends with whomever you like. Even this Vanessa girl. I don't mind. Honestly, it's not like you're going to marry her. The only kind of girl you can marry is one from our background. Old money families, Serena, Blair. You know what I mean."

Nate wants to defend Vanessa but somehow he can't bring himself to argue the truth. It's just how things ran around here. Old money families marry into other old money families.

" Mom, I don't want to talk about it. I have to find a change of clothes for Serena." Nate says changing the subject.

" Anytime you want to talk about it, is fine. My answer is not about to change." Anne says firmly. "And if you would like a change of clothes for Serena, walk into my wardrobe and there should be a closet full of clothes that I have outgrown, they might be a little outdates, but you should find something appropriate in there."

XOXO

Nate follows his mother's advice and picks up a pair of white cotton shorts, a floral print silk blend blouse and a pair of wedge sandals that his mother had put away neatly before walking out and towards his bedroom where Serena was asleep. But when he gets to his room, she is already awake, her hair a tangled mess and her makeup smudged and smeared, but she still looked breathtaking.

"You're up!" Nate says with a smile.

"Morning to you too." Serena says laughing.

Nate walks over toward her, and sits on the bed by her side. "So, how are you this morning? Feeling a little better?" Nate asks. His hand reaches for Serena's and holds it tight.

Serena looks at Nate and smile. "I am a little better than yesterday. But I'm so hungry."

"Well the cooks preparing breakfast, and I brought you up some clothes that my mother no longer wears. I hope they're ok." Nate says handing Serena the ensemble.

"Oh Natie. Thank you! I'll go get dressed and ready before breakfast" she says taking the outfit from Nate's hand and walking towards his bathroom.

She emerges a half hour later, her hair neatly pulled up in a loose bun and her face washed and clean, looking beautiful and taking Nate's breath away as usual.

"Well, if I may say so, I did a wonderful job with choosing the outfit" Nate says laughing.

"Yes you did Nate. But now, I think it's time for breakfast!" She says, laughing and racing Nate down the stairs like she used to when they were both five years old.

They end up stumbling over one another after reaching the dining room, laughing and smiling as though nothing was wrong. Anne sees them both as she is leaving and smiles.

"Hello Serena" She greets a glint in her eye as she walks forward and hugs Serena. "Oh those clothes look wonderful on you!"

"Thank you Mrs Archibald!" Serena says, her smile radiating throughout the room.

Nate pulls out a chair for Serena after Anne has left a room and mock curtseys when she sits down. She playfully punches him on the shoulder and tells him to sit down and stop acting like a three year old.

They sit together and help themselves to all the food the maids have laid out on the table.

"You want to talk about it?" Nate says, after a period of extended silence.

"I want to talk to you. But I can't. We are not the same and I don't know how I can ask you to do this for me?" Serena admits.

"Serena, I don't want you to worry about that trivial nonsense. I don't care how much we've changed because we are still Nate and Serena. Whenever you need me, I'm always going to be there. Don't ever forget that." Nate says.

Serena nods and smiles. She knows that she'll always have at least one person to take care of her no matter what.

"Glad that's sorted. After breakfast you can gather your belongings and I can take you back home." Nate says after picking up his plate and pushing it aside.

The smile on Serena's disappears and is replaced with a scowl.

"Nate, I don't want to go home"

"Serena your mom called last night. She's worried and wants to talk to you. She's home now" Nate says a worried expression clouding his face.

"There's nothing to talk about." Serena says pushing her plate away and getting up.

"Sooner or later you are going to have to have this conversation. You know that. It might be better if you have this conversation out of the way now so that your problems can be sorted out sooner." Nate reasons with her.

When Serena listens to Nate's reasoning, she knows he's right.

"I know but I don't know what to do."

Nate reaches for Serena's hand again. This time Serena just looks at Nate.

"Well first you can attend the 'family meeting'. Lily says Erik, Dan, Jenny and Rufus will be there." Serena wants to say something, but Nate doesn't let her.

"Serena, this problem has been there even since before you even born. It has already happened and there is nothing you can do to undo this. You just have to face it. You can't hide from it forever."

Serena agrees and nods. At this Nate pulls Serena's hand towards him and around his waist, forcing her into a hug which she willingly reciprocates. She melts into his arms and rests her head on his shoulder.

"Okay. I understand. But you will take me home, right?"Serena mumbles into his shoulder.

Nate smiles against her head and replies with a promise.

"I promise I will."

And they both stand there, in each other's arms, and their problems forgotten.

_To be continued..._

Will be updated soon. Review please!

* * *

Special thanks for my beta, Leighton c. thank you so much!


	2. Chapter 2

Author's note : Thank you for review. English is not my first language, so i apologize for my choice of words. but i will try to improve it. enjoy the next chapter.

Disclamer : Gossip girl definitely not mine. don't sue me.

* * *

After left the Palace, Blair went straight home. She had enough Chuck Bass. This time Chuck really hurt her so badly.

Blair hear the bell rang. She walks to the elevator to see who's coming. When the elevator's door open, she never imagine Chuck Bass is the one in it, with red roses in his hand.

" I screwed up. I'm sorry." Chuck said, while giving the flower to Blair.

" It's just hurt so much, Chuck. I've done everything for you, but you're just rejected me over and over again. And then you did that." Blair said. He can see that she's hurt.

" Jack set me up." Chuck said.

" You don't have anybody to blame but, yourself." Blair said, sarcastic.

Chuck step out from the elevator. " I don't intend to blame anybody. I took all the responsibility. I just feel really bad, I don't want to hurt you. This is who I am, Blair. Do you forget? I'm Chuck Bass."

" You can do better than that. I know you, Chuck. You just had to have a little faith. I believe in you. Your father believes in you. Why you didn't believe in yourself?" Blair said.

Chuck smirked, and step away from Blair. " Damn it, Blair! Why did you do that?"

" What?" Blair asked.

Chuck stared at Blair. " Stand by me. Believe in me. I don't want you to do that." Chuck sat down at the nearest sofa. " I will fail you. That's what I do." Blair could see how vulnerable he is right now. " I'm not Nate. I'm not the nice guy. I never will be the prince on a white horse. Your expectation is too high, Waldorf."

Blair smile a little, then sat next to Chuck. " I'm never imagining you as my prince on a white horse. I know who you are, Chuck. When Serena and I used to fought to get Nate's attention, and she always won. You're the guy whom secretly put candy in my bag when I'm sad."

" You knew that. All of this time, you knew?" Chuck asked.

Blair nodded. " I just don't want to admit to you that I like how you took care of me." Blair reaching out Chuck's hand. " It's just me, Chuck. It's Blair. You don't have to hide yourself from me. Don't have to be anybody else. And I don't expect you to be. I love you…the way you are." Hearing the love word again, make Chuck pulled his hand from Blair. But Blair won't let him. " I love you. I will say it over and over again. Until you realize what that means. This is not a game, Chuck."

" I never thought this is a game. Nathaniel is my best friend. I have three important things. One, money. Two, the pleasure that money brings. And three, Nate. I'm not going to jeopardize our friendships just for a game. I thought you knew me better than that." Chuck said, defended himself.

" Then what is it, Chuck? Because I know you love me. Why don't you want to admit that?" Blair asked, forced him to answer.

" Because you're important to me. You, Nate and Serena. After my dad died, the three of you is all I have. I don't want to hurt you." Chuck got up. " I have no confident can make you happy, Blair. That's why I can't say those words to you."

Blair got up too. " But I'm happy. I told you. You don't have to be anybody else. I love the way you are. And that make me happy. Just be yourself. You're Chuck Bass."

That words make Chuck grinned. " Just a little faith, huh?" Blair nodded. Chuck wrap his arms around Blair. Chuck's lips found Blair's. He chuckled, just before he kissed her again, so passionately that she quickly forgot about their argument before. Dorota take a peep from the kitchen, seeing two lovebirds locked to each other.

* * *

Nate pulled over his Lamborghini in front off The Palace, then he turned to Serena at the passenger side. " Good luck. If you need anything, you know where to find me."

Serena smile, and wrap her arms in Nate's neck then kissed his cheek. " Thank you, Nate, for everything. You're always the best." Serena caressed Nate's face before she opens the door and get into The Palace, leaving Nate wondered about that kiss.

Serena got in the elevator and go up to the Van Der Woodsen's suite. When she got in the room, she sees that all of 'their family' member already there.

" Serena…" Lily Van der Woodsen is the first one that got up and approached Serena. Lily attempted to hug Serena, but Serena push aside and sat in the nearest sofa.

" So, I'm here now. What do you all want to say? Just get this over with." Serena said, with bitter tone.

Because of Serena's words, Lily returns to her seat before Serena comes, next to Rufus Humprey. Serena can see how they look at each other, full of love. She can feel that the problems are going to be more complicated.

" Okay, we think, we have to explain it." Lily said.

" I don't want to hear any explanation. There's no explanation in the world that going to make this go away. I just want to know, it is true? We have some brother out there?" Serena cut off Lily's explanation.

Lily looks at Serena with her sad looks, and finally she nodded. " I'm sorry. For its worth, I just seventeen that time. I don't know what to do. I know I was wrong, I'm not going to defend myself."

" And I don't know any of this. If I knew…" Rufus trying to explain too, but Serena cut him off too.

" You're going to marry her?" Serena asked, blunt. Rufus and Lily look at each other again, but not say any words. Serena stood up and want to get out from there. But Lily tries to prevent her from leaving.

" Serena! We have to talk it out." Lily said.

Serena stop walking and turnaround facing them again. " What to talk? If we talked about this, is it going to change? It's already happened! It's in the past. We can do nothing about that. I don't want to have a talk about anything. This is too much for me!" Serena practically scream when she said those word, and then run away from there.

" Serena!" Dan is chasing after her. Leaving the rest of 'the family' behind.

" I think I'm going lie down for a while." Eric said. He stood up.

Jenny stood up too. " I'm coming with you." They're leaving Lily and Rufus alone.

Lily sighed. " It's gonna be okay. We're just have to be patient." Rufus said. " Everything is going to be fine. You and me. Dan and Serena. We're going to tell them that their brother is not in this world anymore. Then everything will be okay."

Lily shakes her head. " No, we're not going to tell them about that." Rufus confused. " Serena's right. It is too much. I never think about that from her side. Having the same brother with his boyfriend. Yeah, it is too much. She can't even accept this yet, if we tell them our son already died, she's going to be more depressed. Just let it be, Rufus. If they meant to be together, nothing going to stop them." Rufus nodded in Lily's explanation, then he wrapped her in his arms, try to comfort her.

* * *

Dan chased Serena in front of the Palace. " Serena! Stop running!" Dan finally reaching out to Serena, holding her hand.

" I can't, Dan! I just can't!" Serena pulled her hand from Dan, and continue to walk away, until her eyes caught Nate in front of the Palace, standing next to his car. Don't know why, when she looks at Nate, she just wants to cry. She runs to Nate, and hug him tightly. Nate also throw his hands around Serena, try to comfort her. " I thought you're gone."

" I am. But I'm worried about you. That's why I come back." Nate caressed Serena's back, when his eyes caught Dan. He pulled away from Serena. " Dan's here. You should talk to him."

Serena shook her head. " Not now. I can't. Please, Nate. Just get me out of here." Nate stare at Serena. Then reach for her hand, guiding her to his car. Then Nate drove away.

After seeing Nate and Serena's gone. Dan went to the gallery to see Vanessa. " Hi Dan! What you're doing here? I thought you're all having a family meeting?" Vanessa asked. She already know the whole story from Dan.

" We are. And Serena run." Dan said. " Just tell me, where's your boyfriend is? I really need to talk to her."

Vanessa looked so confused with Dan's question. " Nate? Why Nate is in the middle of this?"

" He didn't tell you? He is waiting outside the Palace for my girlfriend. And then he took her. You're really don't know where are they right now?" Dan asked again.

Vanessa shake her head. " I swear, I have no idea. He didn't tell me. I don't even know that they are together right now." Vanessa's mind immediately think about the history between her boyfriend and Serena. Suddenly she remembered what Blair told her at Lily and Bart Bass wedding, " The fact that Nate never got over Serena. You already know that feeling right? Fall over for a guy who loves Serena." It just hit Vanessa. She just grab her purse, say goodbye to Dan, leaving him confused, and run to Blair's home.

When the bell rang again. Blair assumed it's Chuck who's coming back after she forced him to deal with the company first. So she's so shocked when she saw that it's Vanessa.

" What you're doing here?" Blair asked, arrogant.

" Believe me. I don't want to be here either." Vanessa answered.

" Then why you here?" Blair asked again, impatiently.

" You must be knew where Nate is. I can't get a hold of him." Vanessa asked, out with it.

Blair laughed at Vanessa. " You have no idea where your boyfriend is, huh? And you know he's with Serena. So you worry."

" It's my fault. I don't know what I'm thinking of, asking you." Vanessa turnaround and walking away.

" She needs Nate right now." Blair said.

Vanessa hear her, she turnaround facing Blair again. " What?"

" I don't even know why I tell you this." Blair sat in the nearest chair. Vanessa approached her. " She through something at this moment. She needs Nate. So…just lend him for some time."

Vanessa sat beside Blair, looking her straight in her eyes. " Tell me. What you said to me at the Bass's wedding, is it true? Do you mean it? Or you just want to screw with me?"

Blair looked confuse. " What I said?" Blair asked.

Vanessa sighed. " You said Nate never got over Serena." Vanessa can see Blair's eyes suddenly shine. She never wanted to ask this to Blair, but she has to know. " And please, be honest with me."

Blair look at Vanessa seriously. " I'm not kidding. I'm dated Nate for years. And we knew each other our whole life. Well, I think I deserved this. Beneath it all, I already knew that is Serena whom Nate loves from the beginning. I just don't care. And that's not worked out pretty well, doesn't it?" Blair said.

" He probably already forget about Serena right now. That million's years thing ago." Vanessa said in denial.

" Well, you can say that to yourself, and tell me how it turns out." Blair said, sarcastically.

" So, you think he never ever going to got over Serena?" Vanessa asked, blunt.

" I think right at this moment, Nate is really like you. But never ever going to be the same with his feeling to Serena. Serena is his one and only, the love of his life." Vanessa just going strive against Blair's words, but Blair cut it off. " And I know this for sure." Vanessa just silent, thinking about Blair's words. " You tell me, you never caught Nate looking so far away sometimes? I can bet, he's thinking about Serena. You never caught Nate looking at Serena when we're altogether? You can think about it at home. Dorota will see you off." Blair call over Dorota. Dorota come in a second. " Escort her out." Blair got up, and walk away.

* * *

Thank you for reading. Next chapter will be about N/S and also NJBC.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclamer : Gossip girl definitely not mine. don't sue me.

_I'm back, upper east siders and with the hottest news. Summer hasn't arrive yet, but N and S already leaving the city to a beach? Is it going to be a couple vacation? What are they doing there? I will tell you – later. And now, our Queen bee has been officially taken. Congratulations King C. Stay tuned._

_You know you love me,_

_XOXO,_

_Gossip Girl_

_

* * *

_Nate took Serena to the Van Der Bilt private beach because Nate knows beach is Serena's favorite place. " You can stay here for a while. Relax a bit. I will take care everything at home. You don't have to worry about anything."

" You just going to leave me here by myself?" Serena asked.

" I thought you need to be alone right now. To calm down. Gathering your thoughts. I don't want to bother you." Nate said.

" Not from you, Nate. Never from you." Serena assuring him.

Nate wants to object at Serena's statement. She left him once after they had sex at the Shepherd wedding, not even took his phone calls. But he sees how Serena is right now, and decided this is not the right time to talk about that. Nate smile a little and take Serena's hand in his. " Everything is going to be okay. I'm not going anywhere. I'll stay here with you."

Serena throws her arms in Nate's neck, and hug him tight. " Thank you, Nate. What I've done without you?"

" You're never have to find out." Nate said with assuring smile in his face, made Serena feels calm. " You'll always have me, Blair and Chuck." Nate said. " And Dan." Nate added too.

Serena pulled away when she hears Dan's name. " I don't want to talk about Dan right now."

" Serena, you should talk to Dan." Nate said.

" I don't want to deal with that right now. I don't know what to say to him. I can't even look at him right now." Serena said.

" You don't have to deal with him right now. But I think you should talk to him. Serena, whatever you feel right now, he feels the same thing. You're not alone in this. He's in the same place like you are. There's two person in this relationship." Nate tried to persuade Serena. " He must be so worried right now, S. At least call him. Tell him that you're okay. I just thought he is already had a lot in his mind to worried about you." Nate talks with his experience when Serena left two - three years ago. How worried he is, and she's not even want to take his phone calls.

Serena knew that Nate is right. " Okay. I will call him." Serena take her phone and starts dialing Dan's number. It's only take one ring when Dan answers his phone.

" Serena! Where the hell are you? I'm looking for you everywhere. We have to talk." Dan said.

" I can't talk right now, Dan. I can't deal with this now. Just give me a little time, will you?" Serena said.

But Dan not just gave up. " Serena, I understand what you're feel right now. We can get through this. Together. Just…come home."

Serena looked at Nate. He knows that she asked for support, so he reaching her hand, and hold it. " Dan, all I can think about is we're sharing a brother. It's already hard enough with our parent dating. And now? Technically, we also brother and sister. It's too much, even for me."

" Serena -" Actually, Dan also feels the same thing, so he don't know what to say to Serena.

" Maybe -" Serena gathering all the courage she had left. " We should just call it quit."

" Serena, we already through so much together. I love you. And I know that you love me. You really just going to quit on us?" Dan asked.

" What options you think we have? I want to share everything with you, but a brother never crossed my mind." Serena said in bitter tone.

" Just think about it again. You need time, right? I give you time. Think about it." Dan said.

" Let's us both think about this." Serena cut off their conversation and shut down her phone.

Nate squezzed her hand. " Everything gonna be fine. Let's get you drunk!" Nate smirked.

Serena laughed. " That's what you do best." Nate holding Serena's hand, guided her to the beach house.

* * *

Serena woke up with a severe headache. She took a glance at the clock, 7am. She's looked what she's wearing, Nate's shirt. And she didn't even remember putting it in. She climbed out of bed and walk to the kitchen. She saw Nate looked busy in the kitchen.

" Nate! It's 7am in the morning. What you're doing so early?" Serena approached Nate in slow steps.

" Hey, you're up. A little too early if remembered how drunk you are last night." Serena can see that Nate made breakfast. Nate handing a cup of coffee to Serena. " Coffee will help with your hangover."

Serena drank it straightly, a little too fast, so she spilled some in the shirt she's wearing. " Sorry. I spilled some in your shirt."

" It's okay." Nate said. Suddenly his face turned red.

Serena saw it too, and she knew why his face turned red. " So, it's your shirt." Serena said, try as casual as possible, but she can felt that her face is turning red also.

Nate saw Serena's red face. " We're not – you know, if you thought about that." Nate stuttered. " I swear I just have one glass of wine last night."

" Okay." Serena said, awkwardly.

But Nate hasn't stop talking. " I had to changed your shirt. You're puked all over your dress. And we forgot to take out the luggage from the car." Nate tried to explain.

" You always do that." Serena said, smile sincerely.

" What?" Nate asked, confused.

" Took care of me. Everytime I messed up, you're there to cleaned up my mess." Serena said.

Nate smirked. "I'm used to." They just exchange look for a while in silent. It's Nate that broke out their silentness. " So, we have a whole day to have fun. What do you want to do?"

" I don't know. What do you want to do?" Serena asked back to Nate.

" Hey, you're Serena Van Der Woodsen. You're the one that plan. And I will followed." Nate smirked.

Serena thought about it for a second then she smiled. " Let's build a sand castle."

Nate looked Serena. " The last time we made that -"

" The summer when we turned thirteen." Serena completed Nate's words. " The next year you already dated Blair." Serena added.

Nate grinned. " We have to take the advantage that Blair not here."

Serena laughed. " Definitely. She never let's us playing with sand if we're all here together." Serena said. Serena's smile disappeared. " I miss us."

" What do you mean?" Nate asked.

" It's been a long time since we're all together, Nate. Just the four of us. We used to be together all the time." Serena answered.

" Let's call them. Take it as an early vacation." Nate said. He already prepare to dials Chuck's numbers.

But Serena grab it before he can called Chuck. " Later. Let's make our self a sand castle." Serena put Nate's phone in the next table, then pulled Nate's hand to the beach.

* * *

Vanessa entered the gallery and looked for Dan. She found him in the café, apparently make him self a latte. She approached him. She throw her phone in the table. Dan almost jumped because of it.

" What the hell!" Dan startled. " Vanessa! What you're doing?" Dan asked.

Vanessa sat in the chair in front of Dan. " You already seen Gossip Girl?" Vanessa asked Dan, appointed to her phone.

Dan took her phone and looked what is it that Vanessa referring to. " Yes, I knew that they're together. So?" Dan lift up his face and stare at Vanessa.

" You read it, right? You not worried at all?" Vanessa asked Dan, surprised.

" Vanessa, Nate and Serena is best friend. They've been best friend since they were little, just like us. You don't think you're overreacting?" Dan said.

" No, I'm not. My boyfriend hasn't called me in a week, and he spent his time with your fabulous girlfriend. So, no. I'm not overreacting." Vanessa blurted it out.

Dan gave his latte to Vanessa. " Drink this. Calm down a bit."

Vanessa get up from seated, open the refrigerator, take out a beer and drink it. She faced Dan. " I'm worried, Dan. I'm really worried."

Dan approaching Vanessa, grab the beer in her hands, put it to the nearest table, and guided her to the chair. " The four of them is like one package. It's their baggage. Can't have one of them without the others. You have to learn accepted that."

" No, I don't. I can't, Dan. I feel like losing my mind." Vanessa said. Vanessa grabed her phone that lying on the table. " I will called Blair. Maybe she hears from them."

" You calling Blair?" Dan said in surprised.

But Vanessa ignored him and dials the numbers. But still after a while, there's no answer from Blair. " She's not answering."

" Strange if she really took your calls. Just calm down." Dan said. But in his heart, he's started thinking the same thing. Serena and Nate already went away for quite a while, and haven't called.

* * *

" She keeps calling me." Blair said in disgust.

" Who?" Chuck asked. He lie down in Blair's bed, flipping page from Vouge.

Blair show her phone to Chuck. " Vanessa."

It took his interest. Chuck put down the magazine, and smirked. " So you two best friend now that Serena left town?" Chuck teased her.

Blair ignored him, and put her phone on the nightstand then stared at Chuck. " So, Lily adopted you?" Blair shifted the conversation.

" Yeah. It's not the fun decision. But the best that we can do right now. Jack shipped back to Australia. And Bass Enterprise in safe." Chuck reaching Blair hand.

Blair smile sincerely. " You have a real family now, Chuck. You're not by your self anymore. It's legal in law. Lily is your mother. Serena and Eric is your brother and sister. Congratulations, Chuck."

" I don't know about that. The important thing is Jack is gone." Chuck said, denied what Blair said.

" Lily cared about you. She didn't have to took care of you now that Bart was gone. But she did. She cared about you." Blair kissed Chuck's hand and lie in his chest. Chuck hugged her tightly.

" Speaking about family. How is my dear sister? They've been away for the whole week." Chuck asked.

Blair rolled facing Chuck. She smile. The smile that means there's something she wants, Chuck knew it. " Let's go visit them."

" What? It's not even a holiday yet." Chuck said.

Blair got up. " You never care about that before. You're Chuck Bass."

Chuck got up too. " But you do. You're Blair Waldorf. You're all about rules."

" It's weekend. We can take a few days off. Just the four of us." Blair stared Chuck with her needy eyes. " Just like old times."

He looked at her, and he knew, there is no way getting out of this. " Fine."

Blair and Chuck drove to the Van Der Bilt private beach the next day. " They going to be so surprise." Blair said, excited as she step out from the limo. Chuck followed behind her. Blair practically run toward the door. But before she knocked, the door opened. It was Nate, carrying the bags.

" Blair!" Nate look away and sees Chuck too. " Chuck! What you two doing here?"

Serena came out from the house too. " Blair! Chuck!"

" You two already want to go home?" Blair asked.

Nate and Serena secretly looked at each others. " Yeah. It's been a week. We have school, you know." Serena answered.

" But we just got here." Blair said.

" It's not a holiday time, Blair. Come on. Let's go home." Serena pulled Blair away from the door. Blair looked at Serena and Nate, suspiciously. She and Chuck exchanged look at each others. Chuck shrugged.

" I think it's about to rain. We should go now." Nate said.

" Can I ride with you guys?" Serena asked Blair.

Blair got more suspicious. " What?" She looked at Nate. He didn't seems to care. He carried the bags to the car. And Serena got into the limo, leaving Chuck and Blair stared at the both of them, confused.

_to be continued..._

* * *

Author's note : Sorry it took me so long to update. enjoy. thanks for reading.

Next chapter will be up soon. more NJBC...


	4. Chapter 4

Disclamer : Gossip girl is not mine. If it's mine, Serena and Nate will never broke up, like ever. (T.T)

* * *

_S and N back on the city after their getaway but not even talked to each other after spent the whole week together. What happened in the beach? We will find out. Spotted, The lonely boy stood in the rain, broken heart over – not else that Serena Van Der Woodsen. Where as, N decided to pour his heart to the girl of his dream, so there is no place for another girl. My condolences, V._

_You know that you love me,_

_XOXO, Gossip Girl_

_

* * *

_They can't left Nate drove by himself, so Blair forced Chuck to drove with him. Chuck keep complained, but he still drove with Nate.

" It's so stiff here." Chuck sighed.

" Nobody asked you to come with me. You can just sit in your limo." Nate said.

" I'm a good friend, Nathaniel. It's the girls, anyway. Why I want to gossip with them." Chuck stared at Nate with grin in his face. " So tell me what's going on between you and my sis?" Chuck asked.

" What? Nothing." Nate answered, just a little too fast. Chuck caught it too.

" You spent time with Serena for the whole week. Just the two of you. Now you two can't even be in the same car? Something happened. Come on, tell me." Chuck keep pushed Nate.

" Well - we kind of - drunk last night, and - you know." Nate stuttered.

" Jeez Nathaniel, it's never going to off the table between the two of you." Chuck teased.

" Yes, Chuck. That's the kind of reaction that I need." Nate said, sarcastically.

Chuck just smirked and ignored Nate's words. " Do you ever tell her how you feel?"

" What are you talking about?" Nate said, pretended that he don't understand.

" That you're in love with her – your whole life." Chuck bluntly said.

" What? That's not true." Nate unwilling to admitted.

" Nate, everybody knew. Even Blair." Chuck said.

Nate can denied it anymore. " Well, Serena doesn't."

" So tell her, then." Nate looked at Chuck with unbelievable stare that he shouldn't said that.

" It's not really a good time, don't you think? With all of the stuff that going on in her life right now, it's just going to be burden for her." Nate explained it.

" You don't have to be the good guy all the time, Nathaniel. For once in your life, think about yourself. Let her carry it. You think of her too fragile. You don't have to protect her. She can handle this. And she need to know that you carry this feeling for a long time. You deserved this." Chuck said.

" But Chuck…" Nate still tried to refused.

" Don't let her get away again this time." Chuck said seriously, make Nate think serious too.

* * *

In the limo, Blair and Serena talked about the same matter. " First of all, you can have a real relationship with him, you know. You two have to stop the drunken sex."

" Blair." Serena just ignored her comment.

" So, what you're going to do now? Nate or Dan?" Blair asked.

Serena looked Blair in unbelievable stare. " There no choice. I don't think continue dating Dan is a good idea. But about Nate. We're just friend. Nothing more. The sex is a mistake, and not going to happen again." Serena said, more to convincing herself.

" S, at least you can be honest with yourself." Blair said, tired.

" What?" Serena asked.

" Nate just a friend? That's a lie. Nate never just be a friend to you, maybe when we're very little." Blair looked Serena with serious looks. " I'm your best friend. He was my boyfriend. You slept with him."

Serena look at Blair with guilty looks. " And I'm very sorry about that. I regretted all the time. I wish it never happen."

" No. It will happened no matter what when you drunk. You betrayed my trust. But I understand. You know why? Because you drunk. You can't think clearly when you drunk. You can't restrain your feeling to Nate when you drunk. I'm your best friend, S. I know how you feel about Nate. But I don't know why you never let yourself feel that way. I understand you betrayed me because Nate is a big deal to you. He's not just some guy. He's Nate! That's why you betrayed me."

" Blair, I - " Serena tried to explained, but Blair cut her explanation before it begin.

" Serena, be honest to yourself. This can be your happy ending at last. Show a little courage. He's not going to be there forever. He's waiting long enough. Think about it." Blair said, forcing Serena to think about it.

* * *

They arrived at New York in the afternoon. After Serena unpacked her bags, she went to gallery to see Dan. The gallery looks empty now, maybe because the rain hasn't stopped yet.

Dan is cleaning some table when he saw Serena.

" Finally you came back. I guess you had a decision now." Dan bluntly said.

Serena clunching to her umbrella, and gathering her courage to say what she wants to say. " I think – we better as friend. Maybe -"

" Don't say it, Serena. I'm not your brother." Dan throw the rag in the nearest table, and approaching Serena.

" But you may as be. I can't stop thinking about it, Dan. I can't say that doesn't bother me, because it does. We don't have many options left, Dan. He's not going anywhere. He will be there everwhere we go." Serena said, notify the problem.

Dan leaning to the table, and sighed. " There must be another way. I don't want to give up just like that."

Serena is the one that approaching this time. " There is no other way. We're bound by blood, Dan."

" Please don't say that, Serena. We're not brother and sister. Yes, we're sharing a brother. But it doesn't meant that we also brother and sister. We can get through this. Just don't give up on me yet, Serena." Dan begged her. Dan reaching out Serena's hand.

But Serena rejects him. She pulled her hand from Dan. " I can't, Dan." Serena took a step back, away from Dan.

But Dan kept came near her. " Yes, you can. I know you still love me. We love each other. We can get through this."

Serena's face already wet with her tears. " Do you ever thought about him?" Serena asked.

" What? Our brother?" Dan asked.

" One day we will meet. What he will think about us? What he's going to tell his friends about us?" Serena raised her head and looked at Dan. " His brother and sister dating each other? I don't want to be that person, Dan. Why we have to be that person?"

" Is that what you worry about? What people think about you?" Dan asked, astonishing what he just hear.

" This is upper east side. I'm Serena Van Der Woodsen, what do you expect from me?" Serena said.

" I can't believe this. Of all the problems, what you worry about is how people looked at you?" Dan asked, once again.

" I'm sorry, Dan." Serena run leaving the gallery without looked Dan again.

" Serena!" Dan running too, chased after Serena. Outside the gallery, in the rain, Dan sees Serena step in the limo, and left him. He just stand there a while, in the pouring rain, hope that rain can heal his broken heart.

* * *

Nate called Vanessa to met him in the central park. Vanessa a little surprised, Nate finally called her. When she arrived at the central park, Nate already sit in one of the bench, waiting for her. She sat beside him.

" Finally you came home." Vanessa opened the conversation.

" I want to apologize. I just went without telling you. I'm not even called you. I'm sorry, V." Nate said, sincerely.

Vanessa smile a little. " Honestly, I'm a little angry that you left. And not called me. But now you're home. So, forget it." Vanessa reaching out Nate's hand. But Nate pulled it. " What's wrong?" Confused looks appear in Vanessa's face.

Nate looked at Vanessa. " I'm sorry."

" What you sorry for again? You said that earlier." Vanessa asked.

" I slept with Serena." Nate bluntly said.

Vanessa can feel her heart broke when Nate said that. " What? You slept with her?"

" I'm sorry. We're drunk. It just happened." Nate tried to explained.

Vanessa gathering all the courage to asked him. " Is it over? Between the two of you?" Vanessa asked. " That's all I need to know. I wont make this a big deal, I will forget this. But I need to know that is really over between the two of you."

Nate reaching Vanessa's hand and wrap it in his. " I'm sorry."

" This is the fourth time you said that you sorry. We just met five minutes ago." Vanessa said. Vanessa can feel what's coming. " I can take it. You can said it to me." Vanessa looked at Nate with her teary eyes.

She can sees the guilt in Nate's eyes. And he felt really guilty, but this is what he has to do. " I loves her. I'll always love her. I'm sorry."

" Stop saying you're sorry, Nate!" Vanessa yelled, and get up.

Nate also get up. " I'm really sorry, Vanessa. I never meant for any of it to happened. It just – it's her. It always her. I'm sorry, that I can't control my heart to give up on her."

Vanessa stood facing Nate. " So you want to break up with me? And be together with Serena?"

" I don't know if she will accept me. But I won't lied to you. I will do anything to make her accept me." Nate admitted. " I'm really sorry, Vanessa."

Vanessa walks away without said anything again to Nate, left her stood there feeling very guilty. But he's not sorry for doing this. He willing to take all the guilts, he just want to be with Serena. And he will make sure, Serena can't runaway again this time, because he already decided.

* * *

Serena hold her phone, and ignores it for a few minutes. But the vibrates not stop yet. She sighed, and hit the answer button in her phone. " Stop calling me, Nate. You stalking me." Serena finally answer her phone and yelled at Nate.

" I'm outside. We need to talk." Nate said, simple.

" I have nothing to say to you." Serena answered coldly.

" I do. You can just listen. I'm not going to go until you come out." Nate said. Serena know Nate meant it what he said. She looked up the window. The weather outside the Palace looked still rainy. Serena stayed in Chuck's suite because she doesn't want to go home to live with Lily yet.

" I'll be there in a sec." Serena said, and going down to see Nate. Nate waiting for her under the tree outside the Palace. " Five minutes. You better start talking soon, cause I'm counting." Serena said, sitting down beside Nate.

" I broke up with Vanessa." Nate started. " I tell her what happened between us."

Serena look at him, there's shock looked in her eyes. " What's the matter with you, Nate! Since when you became a saint that always talk honest with your girlfriends. When you cheated on them, you shouldn't said anything!" Serena yelled.

Nate ignoring Serena's anger. Nate looked at Serena. " I want to start over, Serena. I'm serious this time." Nate took Serena's hand in his. " I'm not letting you go this time. I'm always letting you go, wishing that someday you'll find the courage to admit your own feeling. But it seems that will never happen if I don't do anything about it." Serena just sat still, not said anything. " I'm all in this time. I'm going to be very patient. I'll do whatever it takes to make this work. Tomorrow, I'll pick you up at seven."

Serena shaked her head, and laughing awkwardly. " I'm not dating you, Nate. This is ridiculous."

" Serena, please give us a chance. Since the first time we slept together, you never give me a chance to prove my feeling for you. We're just avoiding this topic. At least be honest to each others." Nate said it out loud. " I'll see you tomorrow night." After he said that, he just walking away, doesn't give a chance to Serena to refused again.

* * *

" Why you keep seeing your watch?" Blair asked, anxious looked at Serena. Serena is hanging out in Waldorf Residence.

" What? Nothing." Serena answered.

But Blair keep looked at her. " I don't believe you at all, S. Come on, talk to me." Blair forced Serena to said it.

" I kind of have a date." Serena answered, defeated.

" With who? You just broke up with Dan. Well done, Van Der Woodsen." Blair said, kind of amazed.

" Nate." Serena simply answered.

" You have a date with Nate? When?" Blair asked.

" Ten minutes ago." Serena answered when she looked the time right now is seven past ten minutes.

" What you're doing here, then? Are you meeting with him here?" Blair asked.

" I'm not going. I'm not dating Nate. I can't dating Nate." Serena answered.

" Why?" Blair asked. Serena just stay quite. Blair just look at Serena for a while, then she open her mouth. " S, we never talked about this before. I always thought Nate is our sensitive topic, so I never discussed anything about him. But I'm your best friend. I can see through you. I knew you love him." Serena still don't say anything. " We don't judge, remember? We're the non judging breakfast club." Blair said it with her assuring smile.

Serena saw Blair, and suddenly she's ready to told her best friend everything. She just Blair. " My Dad left when I was seven. Did you remember?"

" Of course. You cried for three days straight, and not said a word in the whole week." Blair remembered that days. Nate is so worried about her. After school, he will came to her house, and sat down with her in silent until dark. Even she knew Serena needs him that time, she still feel jealous. " You've never been the same after that."

" There's always something missing in me since that day." Serena said. Blair silently listened to her. This is the first time, Serena mentioned about her Dad since he left. " He hurt me deeply when he left. He abandoned us. He doesn't even called to check on us. When I finally can picked up the pieces, I won't let myself hurt again. It hurt too much. I can't endure another pain."

Suddenly Blair understand why she always rejected Nate, even Blair knows that she loves him too. " That's why you never face your feeling to Nate?" Blair asked, just to be sure.

Serena nodded. " I have a – few – guys in my life. I never took any of them seriously, except Dan. He's not like the other guys I known."

" Why Dan?" When Blair asked that, Serena knows that she understand.

" Because he's like Nate." Serena answered.

" Like Nate?" Blair asked, confused.

" He felt like Nate, for me. He's as nice as Nate. He understand me like Nate always do. He accepted me for who I am, like Nate did. When I'm with him, I can feel Nate. But however he liked Nate, he's not Nate. He can't hurt me like Nate will do." Serena explained it all. Serena hug herself. She looks so vulnerable right now.

Blair understand everything now. Serena is a wounded girl. Blair never knew that her dad departure effected her that much. " Nate is a big deal for you. That's why you never treat him like the others. I knew that. But I never knew that will make you scares the most. That Nate will hurt you."

Serena's tears fall down in her cheek. " I can handle anymore pain, B. He's that important."

Blair sat down beside her, and hold her hand. " He's – " Blair try to find the right words to describes Nate, to stick up for Nate. " Nate." Serena looks up to Blair. " He's Nate, Serena. He loves you. You know that he loves you. He always love you. This is not about blindly faith. It's just Nate. You knew him better than anyone. He'll never hurt you, S. Not intendly, anyway." Serena just sat still listening what Blair said. It stuck in her heart.

Suddenly there's a knock in the door. " Miss Blair." Dorota is the one that knocking. She opened the door.

" There's Mr. Nate downstairs for Miss Serena." Dorota gave the notification.

Blair just sat still ignoring Dorota's notification. " Did you told him that I was here?" Serena stares at Blair.

" How could you accuses me. I just found out that you had a date with Nate." Blair pretending to be offended. Serena looked at Blair with her pleading eyes. Blair knew what Serena wants. " No. This is you and Archibald's problem. I don't want to stuck in the middle of this. I already donate my home." Blair stand up and face Dorota. " Tell Nate Serena will be down in a minute." Dorota walk away to delivered Blair's message. Then, Blair face Serena that melted in her bed, doesn't want to get up. " Be honest with him, S. You're not ready. Tell him that. But tell him the truth. You cant avoid this forever." Blair pulls Serena's hand. " Now get you ass up, and meet him!" Blair push Serena out from her room, and locked herself up.

To be continued...

* * *

Author's note : Thank you for reading. It came a little hard lately. But i will determine to finish this up.

The next chapter will be about Serena, Nate, Dan and Vanessa. The love square in this story.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclamer : Gossip Girl is not mine.

* * *

_**I have the big news upper eastsiders. Rainy days are over when the sun shines all day long. So is our new couple, bright and shiny. Spotted, S and N kissing each others in front of The Palace. So I guess they're together**_

_**now. I think I represent everyone to say, it's about time. But hasn't crystal clear, because the lonely boy just threw a fist at N, with S and V screaming in the background. Love square? We will find out soon.**_

_**You know that you love me,**_

_**XOXO, Gossip Girl**_

Serena steps very slowly to the first floor, while she gathering her thoughts what she wants to say to Nate. But when she saw Nate, standing handsomely waiting for her, suddenly all her thoughts are gone. He wears his blue shirt that match up with his blue eyes. Serena can feel her heart melt for the guy.

So is Nate. No matter how much time they have spent together. How close they are to each others. His heart still beating so fast when he sees her. Even in her sweatshirt, without make up, her blonde hair messed up, she always the most beautiful girl in his heart.

" Hi." Nate greeted her, hands out to her. She gave her hand. Nate took Serena's hand in his, help her step down from the stairs.

" How do you know I was here?" Serena asked, pulls her hand again.

Nate smiles sincerely. " You always find me – or Blair, if I was the problem."

" Sometimes I hate you for knowing me so well." Serena walks down to the nearest couch, and sit, then give hint to Nate to sit beside her.

But Nate sit in front of her, at the coffee table. He sat there so he can see her directly in her eyes. " So, why are you here? We have a date." Nate remind her, not that he thinks she forget. " I want to do this right, Serena. You have to talk to me. So we can work this out." She just quietly sit there, doesn't know what to say. " Or maybe you want me to leave?" She still quite. So Nate caresses her head and kiss her in the forehead. " Talk to you later, then." He just get up.

Serena plan to let him leave, but her hand is have its own mind and grab Nate's hand before he walks. Nate doesn't say anything, just sit again looking at her. " You just gonna leave like that?"

" I will give you space if that's what you want. I told you before, I will be very patient. I'm won't put pressure on you. We're doing this slowly."

Serena looking up to Nate. She can see the confidence in Nate's eyes. And she doesn't want to disappoint him. The least she can do is - " Honestly, I don't know what to say." She looks away, and locked her gaze on the floor. She thought about what Blair said before. " _**He's Nate**__._" She build up her courage and turned to him again. " I can't promise you anything right now. But I do love you."

Nate feeling wants to jumping around because of happiness. " That's a good starts." Nate smiling and shift to Serena's side. He took her hand in his. She looks at him and smile.

* * *

This few weeks Nate and Serena always spent the days together in Chuck's suite. Nate will come to Chuck's suite and brought a lot of Serena's favorite movies in dvd. Then, they spent all day mocking at movies. They will order take out. They play _guitar hero_. They do everything that friends do. The things that they used to do, minus the booze. Sometimes they invited Blair and Chuck too.

" Lets have a double date." They watching _Autumn in New York_ at the time, when Blair suddenly opened her mouth in silence. Chuck shook his head and pauses the movie.

" I told you, don't do it, Blair." Chuck said, tired.

" They've been doing this for quite some times. I felt sorry for Nate." Blair said, play her eyes to Serena. Serena leaning down to the couch, and pretending don't hear anything. Nate do the same thing next to her. " Fine. I feel sorry for myself. My two best friend who by the way, loves each others, keep doing this useless thing."

Chuck get up from the couch and pulled Blair. " I will take my girl, and shut her up. You two, working on your issues." Chuck grab Blair's hand, and get her into his bedroom.

Nate and Serena just sit still watching Blair struggling from Chuck's grab. She even bites his hand, and he bites her finger. After they closed the door, Nate and Serena looked at each other and laughes.

" That is way more good than this movie." Nate said, still laughing.

" Definitely." Serena said, also still laughing. Her hair falls down covering her eyes. She want to pushed out her hair, when Nate do that first. Nate pushed out her hair out of her face, and caressing her cheek with his index finger. He gently smiling at her, make her heart suddenly beating so fast. She can feel her face turned red. Nate notice that too, and that makes him happy for the fact that he can make Serena feels nervous.

" We never went to that date. Lets have that date. Not with Blair and Chuck. Just the two of us. What do you think?"

Serena just stared Nate for a while, studying his face. He smile gently at her, make her wondering what's on his mind. She used to able read what's on his mind. Nate is like an open book for her. But apparently not this time. " Tell me what's on your mind?" Serena give up guessing and asks him.

Nate laughes hearing Serena's question. " You. I always thinking of you." Nate answered, playfully.

" If I say no?" Serena asked.

Nate still smile gently at her. " It's okay. I'll wait." Nate simply answered.

But that's simple answer is good enough for Serena. She realizes that Nate is the only one keep trying for them. She hasn't do more for him. So she smile and nodded. " Okay. Lets have that date."

" Are you sure? You don't have to, you know. We can just like this for a while. Just like we used to." Nate asked.

Serena smiles at him. Typical Nate. Always put her interest above all. " Yeah, I'm sure. I can't wait to see how Archibald on a date." Serena grins at him.

Nate laughes, and leaning down on the couch again. " I already put all my efforts on this." Nate said, relax.

" What is it? What are you planning?" Serena asked, curious. He can sees that.

" You'll see." Nate said.

" Come on, Nate. Tell me." But he ignoring her, who finally give up and pouting next to him, makes him laughing.

* * *

Serena busy picking up dress for the date, with Blair flipping _vogue_ behind her. " So you're finally will go on this date with Nate?"

Serena turnaround looking at Blair. " Yes, that's why I need you to help me pick a dress. Not just sitting there reading magazine."

" It's Nate. You can wear a pyjamas, he still will think you're beautiful." Blair said, doesn't care and still flipping her magazine.

" I can't go on my first date wears pyjamas." Serena turn back scrambled her wardrobe. She take a _Versace_ golden dress. " This is too slutty." She put it back. She take a _Dolce_ blue dress. " This is too formal." And she keeps on and on.

Blair shook her head in defeat. She put away the magazine, and looking at her best friend. " You're losing it, S."

Serena turnaround again looking at Blair. " I can't seems to find the right dress. It's all junk."

" Come here!" Blair ordered. Serena obeyed and sat beside her. " He's Nate. You can wear any dress you want."

" One dress makes me too slutty, the others makes me looks like a prude."

" You are slutty." Serena stared at her. " And Nate knows it. This is just Nate. You can be who you are. You don't have to pretend not slutty, or be a prude. He knows who you are. He loves who you are."

Serena sighed and nodded. She knows Blair is right. It is just Nate. She sat up again and take a white _Philip Lim_ dress.

" I'm your best friend, S." Serena turnaround looking at Blair with confused looks in her face. " I get it that you're afraid. But don't be too long. You can't expect him to waiting on you forever." Blair take the magazine and starts flipping again, leaving Serena wondering what she said.

* * *

The end of the week, Nate pick up Serena to their date. Blair and Chuck intentionally stay at home to spying on them.

" You two aren't gonna following us." Nate declared, before he grab Serena's hand and get out from the suite.

" You know Blair Waldorf will not listening to you, right?"

Nate smiles. " That's why I already asked Chuck to handle her."

Serena laughing as she reaching Nate's hand. " So where are we going?" Serena asked, clunching to Nate.

" You'll see." Nate answered.

" You still not telling me?"

" You can see it yourself in a minutes. Be patient, Van Der Woodsen." Nate grinned at her, amused seeing her so curious. It took him a lot of time to plan what to do when you take Serena Van Der Woodsen on a date, because Serena is different from the girls he ever dated. But it's not hard for him to think it, because he knows exactly what Serena likes.

He parked his car in front of the _city cinemas_, at the Park Avenue.

" Your idea of a perfect date is a movie? Let me guess dinner and a movie?"

" Everyone need to eat. And this movie is great. Come on!" Nate get out from the car, running to the passenger seat and opened the door for Serena. She's not used of him being romantic. He is used to taking care of her, but rarely in the romantic way. She giggles. " We're on a date. You said you wanted to see me on a date." Nate locked the car in a beep, then he hands out his hand to her. She smile and gave her hand to him.

Nate holding Serena's hand and steps in the theater.

" Good evening Mr. Archibald." A young women in the suit approaching them, and shaked Nate's hand.

" Is everything ready?" Nate asked her. Serena just stand quietly beside him, curious.

" Of course, Mr. Archibald. Please come with me." She walks inside the theater. Nate grabbing Serena's hand and following her.

The other persons who also working at theater starts to gossip about them after Nate and Serena walks into theater one.

" Is that Nate Archibald? From the Van Der Bilt?"

" Yeah, he knows our boss. He called in a favor to use the theater privately for a date."

" With Serena Van Der Woodsen?"

" He didn't said it. But you know her?"

" Everybody knows her. She is Serena Van Der Woodsen. But I thought they're just friends."

" Clearly not considering they're on a date and looking like a couple."

" We should update Gossip Girl."

* * *

Nate and Serena sitting in the dark inside theater one as '_Pretty Women_' playing in the screen. " This is an old movie. There's no way a theater would play it again." Serena whispering in Nate's ear.

" Well, I'm a Van Der Bilt, I can called in a favor."

" Are you did that to all of your date?"

" Just you. I never used this much effort just for a date."

Serena smile at him. He can really sees since it is dark, but she always look breathtakingly beautiful. She shifted her face, kiss Nate's cheek softly. " This is seems like going to be a good date." She said, as she gaze her surrounding.

The theater is not empty. The persons who watching the movie is not just them. " I want it to be private, just you and me. But you don't like private. So I just picked the movie, and told them that they still can sold the ticket."

" Nobody knows me better than you."

" This is just the starting, I already plan the whole date." Now is Nate's turn to kiss Serena's cheek. Then, he hold her hand, and shift the attention to the screen.

After seeing a movie, Nate took Serena to the Archibald manor. " Already the end of the date?" Serena asked, as Nate opened the door.

" My mom is in Hamptons. I already told the maids to leave. In here just the two of us."

" So, what's the plan?"

" I know you like crowd. But I'm a romantic. So just the two of us for dinner. The chef already finished cooking for us."

Serena laughing. " I thought you're going to say that you will cook for me."

" I thought about that, trust me. But it's kind of out of my league." Serena giggles.

Nate took Serena to his backyard. They used to play there when they were little. But it looks so different now with candle light and a table at the center. The yard is decorated with flowers. The atmosphere is so romantic.

Serena just smile when Nate took her hand, guiding her to the table. They have dinner as they talking about their childhood, and a lot of Blair and Chuck topic. They're not talking about Vannesa or Dan, or even their relationship.

" So, whats the next agenda in our date?" Serena asked, after they finished dinner.

" This is the main agenda." Nate grinned at her. " Wait here." He running back to the house, then hurry back a minute later. He bring a blanket from the house, then he put it on the ground. He take out an _ipod_ from his pocket, and play the song '_The way you look tonight_'.

" Come here." Nate sitting on the blanket and call out Serena.

She walks to him and sit beside him. " What we're doing?" Serena asked, confused looks on her face.

" We're gonna lie down and look at the stars. There is romantic music." Nate lie down on the blanket.

Serena still sat there and watching Nate. She wants to say something, but no words come out. " This is so cheesy, Nate."

Suddenly Nate burst out laugh and sat up. " That's kind of the point. You should see you face right now." Nate can't stop laughing.

" What?" Serena getting more confused.

" I'm just kidding around. Just want to see your face if I asks you to look at the stars."

Serena understands now. Nate just joking with her. She's pouting and hit Nate. " That's good, Nate." Nate laughing and running. Serena chases him. They chases each others inside the house. When Serena succeeded chasing Nate, he push Serena to the wall. They just standing looking at each others in the eyes. He felt her shivered when he put his hands down to her waist. Serena turn to him and their faces were inch apart. Serena looked down at Nate's lips, he looked at Serena's, but then Serena quickly turned at the opposite side. Nate smiles, and pulled away from her.

" Come on. Our real agenda." Nate reaching Serena's hand and take her to the living room. The fireplace is on. Pillows spread out on the karpet. " We're going to sleepover."

Nate leave her in there for a while. When he's back, he brings food cart. " What is that?" Serena asked, as she walks approaching Nate and the cart.

" I already prepared strawberries, chocolate, wiped cream, and – " Nate take one bowl from the cart and give it to Serena. " Truffles. Your favorites."

Serena smiled at him,and put one truffle in her mouth. " I loves truffle."

" I noticed." Nate grinned at her. " At first I want to prepared some booze, but given the situation we're in, I don't think thats a good idea. So you're just have to settle with grape juice."

Serena smirket at him,when he said the situation. Well, the last time when they drunk is ended up with sex. " This it it? We're just going to eats?"

Nate pull a cards from his pocket. " We're going to play card."

Serena's face turned cheerful,and take the card from Nate. " I love playing card with you."

" Of course you do. I always letting you win. Not this time though." Nate grab the card from Serena, and sitting on the carpet.

" You think I'm afraid? I still can win from you. Fair and square." Serena follows him, and sat across of him. " Lets bet. The lose one have to do anything the win one want."

" You're on."

" Be careful, Archibald. I already have plans to punishes you for making fun of me."

" Me too. I still have other ways to making fun of you more." Nate split the card, and shuffles.

After tenth round playing, they decided that Serena is the one that win.

" What do you want me to do?" Nate asked her.

She raised her eyebrows, thinking what she wants Nate to do. Then, suddenly she smiled. " Just make me some warm milk."

Now is Nate turn to raised his eyebrows. Confused looks on his face. " Just that what you want me to do? I can do it without you winning a card game, you know."

" I'm nice. Now hurry up making my milk."

Nate smiles and dissapears into the kitchen. He back ten minutes after with warm milk in his hand. He hand in out to Serena.

" Slowly. It's still hot." Nate said, as Serena drinks.

Serena look up to him. " I know you letting me win - again."

Nate smirked at her. " I thought I was being sincere."

Serena put down the glass, and looking at him in the eyes. " I know you're nice to me. You're the only one that always accepted me for who I am. Everybody always try to change me. I definitely never good enough for my mom. Even Dan. Sometimes I'm too much for him. He said so. But you - you just let me be who I am. Do whatever I want to do. You never told me what to do. Not even once. If I messed up, you were there cleaning up for my mess, and never judged me."

She doesn't realized when her tears suddenly flow down in her cheek. Nate straightened up and reaching out to her hand.

" Serena - "

" I know who you are. I know you won't hurt me. But I don't know why I still can't let myself to accept you." Serena starts sobbing.

Nate shifted closer to Serena. His hands wrap her sholders. " Serena, it's okay. You don't have to push yourself to make a decision now. I'll wait. I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be there for you."

Nate's words make Serena smiles. She leaning her head on his chest, as he tightly wrap his arms around her.

" Now stop crying. Your tears will never for me."

Hearing that make Serena pulled away from him. But he's gently smiling at her. " I will never make you cry." Serena smiles to, as Nate take the glass of warm milk and hands in out to Serena again.

" I always like the milk you make for me better than the others."

" I just poured the milk from the carton and boiled it. It just the same like other milk, Serena."

" No, it's not. You will add some cinnamon on the milk. It's sweet and warm. Just like you." Serena reaching out to Nate's hand. They just smiling at each others.

* * *

Nate walks Serena back to the Palace. They're holding hand as they enjoyed the morning air in silence.

" We're here." Nate said, when they're arrived in front of the Palace.

" Yes, we are." Serena pulled her hand from Nate's. She wrap her arms in his neck, running her fingers through his hair. Nate reached up, catching her hand. Her eyes widened as he brought her fingers to his lips in a gentle caress of a kiss.

" Nate – "

Nate lowered his mouth to Serena's. Serena also responded, parting her lips for his tongue, and wrapping her arms around his neck again. Nate smiled against her kiss.

" So this is it the real reason you broke up with me?" Suddenly Dan show up behind them. Vanessa running behind him.

Serena pulls her hand from Nate's neck. They pulled away from each others. " No, Dan. This is not like what you think." Serena try to explain.

" We've seen Gossip Girl. Your date last night, and now. You two are together, right? Is Gossip Girl lying?" Dan look so mad. Serena don't know how to explain the situation.

So Nate is the one speak up. " It's really not what is like, Dan. We're not really together. You and Serena broke up, that's nothing to do with me."

Dan can't restrain his anger anymore. He pull his fist and hit Nate in the face. Nate falls down to the ground. Serena and Vanessa screaming at the same time.

" I thought you're different from Chuck Bass! I thought Chuck Bass is the worse kind! But you prove me wrong. I thought you're my friend, and you stabbed me in the back." Dan shouted, raised his voice.

Vanessa pulls Dan. And Serena get down helping Nate. His lips bleed.

" Are you okay?" Serena asks, worried. He just smiling as he wipe out his blood. Serena stand up and face Dan. " Dan, let's talk. This is so mess up." Serena walk out from them. Dan follows behind her. Nate and Vanessa just stand still looking their shadow disappears in the corner. Then, they face each others.

" You don't have to explain anything to me. Your last explanation is clear enough for me." Vanessa is the first one to talk. " I just want to know one thing. Are you two – really together now?" Nate can feel how hard Vanessa for asking this.

Nate shook his head. " No. We're not really together yet. We're still trying." Nate said. He's feeling so guilty to Vanessa. But he don't want to lie to her. " I never wanted to hurt you, Vanessa. I really did like you."

" Like me? Just not like you loves Serena?" Vanessa asks.

Nate nods. " I do. I'm sorry." Nate says. Vanessa smile bitterly and walk out without saying anything else. Nate sighed, then dials Chuck's number. But the voice who answered is not Chuck.

" What you need, Archibald?" It's Blair. " Chuck is on the meeting right now. He forgot his phone."

" Nothing. Just looking for my best friend." His voice sounds tired.

" Well, I'm not Bass. But still your best friend too. Where are you? I'll come to see you."

A few minutes later Blair went to meet Nate at their favorite café. They used to have a date here when they're still together. When she sees Nate, he already in his third glass of scotch. When she arrived at his table, she look at him with her judging eyes.

" You drinking in the middle of the day? That's gross." Commented Blair, then she sat across of him.

" You want some?" Nate hold out his glass to Blair.

She put her disgusted face. " No, thanks." She orders water for herself to the waiter then she took Nate's glass and ordered the waiter coffee for Nate. He just sit still without complain. He knew Blair too much. He never going to win against her.

The waiter delivers the coffee. " Drink that." Ordered Blair. Nate obey and drink the coffee, make him a little sober from three glass of scotch. " Now tell me what's going on? The last time I look at Gossip Girl, you and Serena in the good place."

Nate pushed out his bangs from his forehead. " Serena and I, we're doing okay." He remember their kiss before Dan came. " Well, more than okay."

" So what's the problems, then?" Blair asked again.

" It's just – Vanessa, and Dan." Nate said, slowly.

" Nate, this whole thing you're doing? Are you sure it's worth it?" Nate looking up to Blair. " She's not ready. It may take her a long time."

Nate scoffed. " With her. It always worth it." Nate drink the coffee again, a little too fast like he's drinking booze. " No matter how guilty I felt toward Vanessa, and Dan, I can take it. I don't mind be a bastard. I don't care. I'll do anything just to be with her." Even Blair can sees that Nate is lying.

They've been known each other for a long time. She knows how much Nate loves Serena. And he meant it what he said. " I get that. But noone can lie to Blair Waldorf. You don't have to pretend in front of me."

Nate smile a little. " Thanks, Blair. That meant a lot."

" Oh fine. You can have another drink. I will call Chuck to help carry you home." Blair said, defeated seeing her friend so miserable. Nate smile widened.

* * *

Meanwhile, Dan and Serena is going to the gallery. Dan even closed the gallery so they can have a private place to talk. They sit in the one of the table at the gallery's café.

" You wanted to talk. So talk."

Serena drink the water that Dan pouring for her to calm herself. " What happened between you and me, there's nothing to do with Nate."

" So you say there's nothing between you and Nate?"

She can't say there's nothing, because clearly there are something. And she doesn't want to lie to Dan. Not after what happen. But Serena doesn't know what to say.

" I know it." But Dan can guess it, seeing Serena doesn't said anything. Just quietly drinking her water.

" Dan, I know you don't believe me. But this thing with Nate. That's nothing to do with our problem. It's totally different thing. I still going to break up with you even there is no Nate."

" You breaking up with me a few weeks ago. And now you already kissing Nate. What you want me to think."

" I understand what's it looks like. But the truth is not like that."

" I don't believe anything you said. When this thing with Nate started? Is it when you two went away together?"

Serena covers her face with her hand. She knows she have to tell him everything. She took a deep breath and look directly at Dan.

" I slept with Nate when we're went away." She can sees how much Dan hurt because of it. " We were drunk. I'm so sorry."

Dan bitterly laugh at her. " You and Nate. You two seems can't stop having drunken sex. What is the deal between the two of you?"

" I know I was wrong. I shouldn't done that. But it's really nothing to do with me decided breaking up with you. What happened with Nate that night, it's a mistake. But he's not the one between us."

" Serena, stop remind us of our brother! Can we not talking about him for a while? This is about us. There's nothing to do with him. I just wants to figure it out our relationship without considering him." Dan shouted at her.

" But he is there, Dan! You can't pretend that he doesn't exist, because he is! He is the proof that our parents love each others." Serena shout back at him.

" Serena -" He wants to say something, but Serena cut him off.

" Just listen to me first." Dan stay quite. " It's never been easy for us since the beginning. We came from totally different world."

" I'm not the right girl for you. Someday you will know that. Because I can't pretend forever. I never realize how tired I am before all of this."

" I can't be who I am when I'm with you. Because I always been afraid that you won't love me anymore if you know the real me. I'm not a good girl, Dan. I'm a mess. I always am. There a lot of things that I'm hiding from you because I'm afraid you'll see the real me."

" So with Nate, you can be who you are. That's a lamest excuse to slept with him." Dan said, in sarcastic tone.

Serena know, then. That whatever she said, he'll never believe her.

" I don't care you'll believe me or not. But when I decided to broke up with you, Nate is never crossed my mind. I don't know what we are right now, but there's nothing to do with what happen to us."

They just stay quiet in uncomfortable silence for a while. Not one of them talking. Just stare at each others quietly. Dan is the first one talking again.

" Do you really decided that is over between us? You really don't love me anymore?"

Serena looking up to him. She can see hope in his face. She doesn't know what to say to him. She even confuse about how she feels right now. She knew that deep down she always loves Nate. But she can't denied that she loved Dan once too. And maybe still.

Dan reaching out to her hand. " I don't want this is to be the end of us. I still love you very much, Serena. And I know that you still love me too."

Serena pulled her hand from Dan. " I don't know, Dan. I don't know anything anymore." She sat up and walk away. Dan just sit there quitely, looking at her shadow dissapears.

* * *

Blair spent a few hours, waiting for Chuck to finished meeting and pick them out. Chuck carry Nate to his suite because they can't left Nate alone in his house, drunk like that. And Serena hasn't got back yet from talking to Dan.

" I'm so surprise you can wait on him drinking. If it was me, you will pour the booze in my head." Chuck threw his arms around Blair, and kisses her neck.

Blair just stand still, leaning on him. Her hand touching Chuck's hand. " He's so miserable, Chuck. I wish we can do something for him." Blair said in sad tone.

Chuck gets it too. He pulled away from Blair, and walk to the couch. " There's nothing we can do to make him feel better. He chose this. He knows the consequences. And he did it for Serena."

Blair sighed. She walks to Chuck and sat beside him. " Sometimes I don't get what that best friend of mine thinking. Nate is the nicest guy that a girl could ask for."

" Ouch." Commented Chuck, pretending to hurt.

" You know what I mean." Chuck grinned. Blair lock her gaze to Chuck's bedroom that Nate is in right now. " We all know how much Nate loves Serena. Why she didn't realize that? She's afraid to get hurt. But she's hurting Nate instead, to protect herself. How can she thinks that Nate will hurt her? He's Nate. He's been loved her his whole life. He would never hurt her."

Chuck's hand caressing Blair's face as she leaning on him. He kissed her lightly. " She doesn't realizes this now. But she will be someday."

Blair straighten up and turned to face him. " This is eating him alive, Chuck. You should see him. How miserable he is. How guilty he felt toward Vanessa and Dan. Nate is not the cheating kind. Everytime he's cheating, it is with her. She should know that."

" This is Serena we talking about, Blair. She's stubborn, not that you don't know that." Chuck reminded her.

" He is never into booze. The only time he's drinking is with Serena, or you. Now he's drinking in the middle of the day. I worry about him." Chuck doesn't say anything, just quietly sliding his arms around Blair's waist, and she snuggles closer into his chest. They enjoyed each others company so they're not realize Serena flee after hears their conversation.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclamer : Gossip girl is not mine.

* * *

_**I've got bad news, upper easiders! Just spotted, Chuck Bass's limo arrived at the hospital bringing a bleeding victim. That victim is not else than our greatest Nate Archibald. His three best friend is with him. And one lonely boy stuck between them! What happened with N? It had something to do with the one and only, Serena Van Der Woodsen. Is he going to be okay? Let's pray for him. Because how bored is it without our fabulous four of the upper east side. I will keep you update of the situation in definitely.**_

_**You know that you love me**_

_**XOXO, **_

_**Gossip Girl**_

It already midnight, when Nate woke up with a hangover's headache. He got out of bed and out of the room. He saw Chuck and Blair, obviously fell asleep on the couch. He walked into the kitchen and tried to make coffee for himself.

But the kitchen is dark, so he accidently knocked a glass that was on the kitchen table. The glass fell on the floor and make a noise. Blair and Chuck awakened by the sound.

" What is that?"

" It just me, guys. Sorry to scaring you." Nate quickly rushed out the kitchen, before they freaks out.

Blair looked at the clock on the wall. It's 2 o'clock in the morning. " What the hell do you do at this hour?"

Nate rubbed his head. " Hangover." Nate simply answers.

Nate suddenly realized something. " Where is Serena?" The sound he makes when he knocks the glass is quiet disturbing, so it's kind of weird if Serena keeps sleeping through it.

Blair sat up and walked to the spare room, that used by Serena. She's a little peek in the room. " She's not here."

Nate ran take his cellphone and immediately called Dan. It's rang six times, before Dan picked up.

" You do realize what time is this, Nate?" His voice sounds heavy because he just waking up.

Nate ignored Dan's comment. " Is Serena still with you?"

Nate's question get Dan's interest. He sat up on his bed. " No. She left after we talked." He cast a glance at the clock. " And it's been hours ago. What's going on, Nate?"

Nate sighed. " Nothing. Okay, bye Dan." And he just hung up. He turned to Chuck and Blair. " Dan said she already left hours ago."

" I will check on my house." Blair grab her cellphone and starts dialing.

" I will call Eric. Maybe she went home." Chuck turned to Nate. " Check on your house. She used to came there too." Chuck grab his cellphone too. Nate follow Chuck direction and called his house.

A minute later they all off the phone.

" Dorota said she's not in my house."

" Eric said she's not went home either."

Blair and Chuck looked at Nate. " She's not at my house." Nate grab his jacket. " Chuck, call the cops." Nate said as he ran through the door.

" Nate!" Blair shouted, calling him. " You don't even know where she is." But it's too late. Nate already went out the suite.

Blair turned to Chuck. " He's still hangover. And how he will find Serena?"

" I'm calling the cops." Then, Chuck started dialing.

Nate wandering around in Manhattan for almost an hour. He went in and out the bars, looking for Serena. But he hasn't found her. Suddenly his phone rang. He saw Serena's name on the screen. He quickly picked up the phone.

" Serena! Where the hell are you? I've been looking for you everywhere."

" Nate!" Serena laughed. He could hear from her voice that she was drunk.

" Where are you now?" Nate asked her.

Serena keep laughed. It's tough to get information from her when she was drunk. But after a while, Nate managed to find out where she is.

" Don't go anywhere. Just staying there. I will pick you up." Then, Nate called Chuck.

When he arrived at the bar, he could see the bar is empty. Only Serena and a few guys is there. Two guys is hovering around Serena, as she keep drink a glass of tequila and ignoring them.

" Come on. It's late. You should come with us." One of them, a blonde, pulled the glass from Serena.

" Yeah, we'll have some fun." The other guys is a brunette.

Serena grab the glass back from him. " No! Nate told me to stay here. He will pick me up."

" Who is Nate? Is he your boyfriend?" The blonde tease Serena. His hands is around her sholders.

" If he's here right now, he will kick your ass." Serena pushed the blonde away.

" We don't care if he's your boyfriend. We promise that we're more fun than he is." The brunette keep pulled her hands.

Nate approach them. " Get your hands of her!" Nate shouted, as he pulled Serena into his chest with protective hug.

Serena looked at him, and giggles. " Nate!" She wrapped her arms around his neck as she leaning on him.

" So this is your boyfriend, Nate? Doesn't look tough. He's a pretty boy. I bet he is gentle."

Serena caressed Nate's face as she kept laughing. " He is. He is very gentle. He is caring. He is sweet. He is nice. He will do everything for me. I love him so much." Serena stopped laughing and locked her gaze on Nate. They just looked at each other silently.

" Whatever! You can have two, instead of one." The blondes reached out Serena's hand and try to pulled her.

Nate shoved him away. " I told you, keeps your hands off her!" He fell from the chair to the floor.

The brunette laughed at him. " That pretty boy just shove your ass."

The blonde sat up and laughed at Nate. " You don't want to make me angry, pretty boy. You better get out of here when you still have the chance."

Nate stared down to him, then he reach out Serena's hand. " Come on, Serena."

The blonde blocked in front of Nate. " Alone. You're not taking her."

The brunette backed him up. " She's drinking with us. She will come home with us."

Nate clenched his jaw. Nate is very furious but he tred to calm down. " Look man. You guys drunk. I don't want any problem here. Just let us go."

The brunette laughed even louder. So is the blonde. " That's never gonna happen."

They attacked Nate. The brunette flied a fist at Nate, but Nate manages to duck and kicked his stomach, then punched his face. The brunette falls down to the floor after he hit the tables.

" Come on guys! Stop fighting!" The bartender keep shouting at them behind the bar table. And Serena keep screaming as she locked her gaze at Nate's movement. Suddenly she feels sober like she's not drinking anything before.

The blonde take out a gun from his jacket's pocket and turned to Serena. He is laughing. " If we don't get her, nobody can." Serena screamed as he pull the trigger. Nate quickly blocked the blonde's view with his body, so the bullet hit Nate's chest.

" Nate!" Serena ran to him, as he fell down to the floor. His jacket already socked with blood. " No!" Serena pressed the wound with her hands but the blood keep pour out.

The brunette got up and shoved the blondes. " What the hell are you doing?" They suddenly sober too. The blonde threw out the gun to the floor. He is shaking.

The bartender approach them. " Are you crazy? You know who he is? He's Nate Archibald from the Van Der Bilt. They'll never let you go. Get out of here!" They hear the bartender's words and flee the scene.

Serena tried to press the wound but the bleed won't stop. " Oh my God! Nate!" She started sobbing.

Nate tried to smiles at her. " I'm okay. Don't cry."

Suddenly Blair and Chuck, with Dan showed up in the bar. After Nate called him, Dan went to Chuck's suite to found out what happen. He was still in there when Nate called Chuck. So all of them went out together.

" What's going on?" Chuck ran to his best friend.

Nate forced a smirk at him. " It seems I've been shot."

Chuck observed the situation. " Call an ambulance!" He shouted to Blair. But she just stood still. Her body shaken. She's in shock. She never sees this much blood before.

Dan cast a glance at Blair and saw her shaking. He take out his cellphone and started dialing.

" The ambulance will be here in ten minutes." Dan said, as he hung up the phone. He keep looked at Serena. She can't stop crying. Her hand and dress is covered with Nate's blood.

" He don't have ten minutes." Chuck squeezed Nate's hand. He could see how bad Nate's condition right now. His face already looks so pale because lose so much blood.

Chuck turned to Dan. " My limo is outside. Let's carry him to my limo and send him to hospital." Then, he turned to Blair, who still shaking. " Blair, I need you here. Stay focus! Nate needs us right now." She shaking but she nodded.

Chuck grabs Nate's leg as Dan grab Nate's waist. The two of them carry Nate to the limo. Blair opening the doors for them. Serena following them from behind.

Dan is the first one get into the limo. He has no choice than letting Nate lies on his lap because it's hard to moves him without him more bleed out.

Chuck and Blair sit down in front of them, with their cellphone plaster in their ears, arranged the hospitality for Nate.

Serena sat down in Dan's legs, holding Nate's hand as she can't stop sobbing. " Please don't die on me, Nate."

Nate reached out to her face and try to wiped out her tears. " Don't cry. I'm the guy that always wipe out your tears. Don't ruined my image."

" Yeah, you're my knight in the shining armour."

Nate smiled as Serena said that. " That's what you called me when we were little."

" You still are. You always be my knight in the shining armour." Nate smiled at her again and drifted out to sleep as his eyes started to close.

" Don't stop, S! Keep talking. Don't let him fall asleep." Blair said to Serena as she still on the phone.

Serena nodded and caressed Nate's face, make his eyes opened again and looked at her. " Blair called us the non judging breakfast club. Do you remember what Chuck called us when we were little?"

Nate weakly nodded. " The four horsemen of the apocalypse."

" Yeah, Chuck is war because he always the one that make Blair angry. And Blair is famine because the food that she prepare when sleepover can feed hundred people. And you are - "

" Pestilance." Nate completed her sentence.

" You make them sick because you always look at me with lovey dovey eyes."

" I still am." Nate grinned at her.

" And I'm death."

" Because you can kill me just with ignoring me." Nate said again.

" And I'm not ignoring you right now, so don't you dare die on me." Nate squezzed Serena's hand and nodded. " You remember what you told me at Blair's 8th b'day party, when Chuck wanted to blow the candles, and she didn't let him because she' was sure he will spit on her cake. And finally they grab the cake and threw it at each other. Do you remember?"

Nate nodded again. " We will not like them because I would do anything you want."

" And I tell you that I already have what I wanted the most. You. On my side. Then I ask you to promise me that you would never leave my side."

" And I promisedyou."

" Nate Archibald didn't ever break a promise. Don't let me be the first one you do that to."

" I'll do my best. Always. For you." Nate gently stroked Serena's face as she reaches out to his hand. They only see each other without saying any words.

See and hear all of that, Dan just sat quietly. Beside that he can't move, he also don't know what to do, or what to say.

When they arrived at the hospital, the doctors and nurses were already waiting for them in the hospital lobby. Blair and Chuck had arranged everything. They rushed Nate straight to the operating room.

They waited about three hours for the surgery. When the doctor out from the operating room, they all ran over to him.

" How is he?"

" The operation went well. He's going to be fine."

" When can we see him?"

" You can see him now." The doctor turned to Chuck. " Mr. Bass, when we had a gunshot victim, we have an obligation to inform the police. It is a standard procedure."

" Don't worry. I will take care of it."

The doctor still don't give up. " But Mr. Bass – "

" I suggest you better drop it." Dan is the one that said that.

The doctor ordering one of the nurse to escort them to Nate's room. Serena goes straight into the room. Chuck take out his cellphone and press speed dial number five. " It's me. I want to know who shot Nate. And don't forget to be discreet." He hangs up.

Dan approach Chuck. " Who do you call? Why not inform the police?"

Chuck smirked at him. " That's none of your business. Just stay out of it. Nobody can't shot my best friend and get away." Chuck stepped into Nate's room.

Dan stands in front of Nate's room, wondering whether he should come in or not. In the end he decided to sit on the chair outside Nate's room. Blair sat next to him.

" I'm in the mood for answering if you want to ask something."

" Go away, Blair!"

But Blair ignore him. " You never see them like this before. This Serena."

Dan sighed. " We've dated for two years. On and off. Even when we're off, we're still friends. I never knew that there was this side of Serena. Her attachment on Nate. Why I have never seen it before?"

" You come in the right time – for you, when our relationship is in chaos. When Nate and Serena didn't like Nate and Serena. You know what happened before Serena left town, right?"

" Yeah, you've told me. They had sex. She's drunk. And I believe her."

" Me too. I believe she was drunk, so she doesn't have to restrain herself."

This is caught Dan's interest. He turned to Blair. " What?"

" Before this brand new Serena, she is a player. Do you know that?"

" Everyone has a past. The most important is she didn't like that anymore."

" I know she's not. It's not my point. She used to changed boyfriends like changing clothes, because they aren't matter to her. They all just a fling. But not Nate. She always had a feeling for Nate but she never showed them, unless that one time when they had sex. Because Nate isn't a fling. Nate is big deal for her."

He understands know what is Blair tried to tell him. " Okay, Blair, I think I know where this conversation go. You wanted to tell me that Serena and Nate always love each other, right?"

" They are. For me and Chuck see them like this, it just like the old times. Because we always knew that they loved each other."

Dan turned to Blair. " Why did you say all this to me? So I gave up on Serena? Is this some kind of warning?"

" I'll do it if I could. But this is Serena's choice. I tell you this so you' know that their relationship is not that simple. They had sex not because they were drunk." Blair sat up and stepped into Nate's room, leaving Dan to think about it.

A couple minutes later, Dan saw Vanessa ran in the hall to Nate's room. Dan call her. " Vanessa."

Vanessa saw Dan and sat next to him. " How is Nate?" Dan called Vanessa when Nate is still in the operating room.

" The doctor said he'll be fine."

Vanessa got up and stepped toward Nate's room, while Dan grab her hand. She turned to face him. " What?"

" You don't want to get into there." Vanessa just looked at Dan, demanded an explanation. " They all in there."

Vanessa knows what is meant by Dan. The they that Dan referred to are Serena, Blair and Chuck. So she sat again. They just sat together in silence for a while.

Dan is the one that break the silence. " Serena told me she was never able to be herself with me. I understand it now. I never felt so left out like today."

" What 's going on?"

" They talked about many things when we took Nate to the hospital."

" What kind of things?"

" The things that is a big part of Serena's life, that I know nothing about. I just wondered, the feeling between us, is it even real?" Dan sighed. " I know they've been friends for a long time. But I never though about it before. How close they are to each other. How many memories they shared together. How many promises between them. How important they are to each other."

" I always felt that there side of her that I don't get. Their friendships. Not just between Serena and Nate. But all of them. Everytime she has a problem, she will turned to them, not me. They can hate each other, but still love each other. They have their own little world. A world that I can't get into."

Vanessa touches Dan's shoulders as a sign of support. She can only do this at this moment. Her relationship with Nate is not as deep as Dan's relationship with Serena. But she understood why Dan feel like that.

* * *

Serena hasn't closed her eyes since they came to the hospital. She just quietly sat next to Nate's bed and holding his hand. She knew the doctor said that he'll be fine, but she still worried.

It almost midnight at the next day, when Serena heard Nate mumbling in his sleep. She observed him carefully as he opened his eyes. Blair and Chuck fell asleep on the couch in the room.

She smiles when she saw him opened his eyes. " Hi."

" Hi." Nate also smiled at her, weakly.

" How are you feeling?" Nate didn't say anything, just quietly smiled at her as she caressed his hand. " You scared me."

" I know. I'm sorry."

Serena locked her eyes with Nate's. " Don't ever do that again."

" I can't do that. I will do it again in a heartbeat."

Serena shook her head. " I'm not worth your life, Nate."

" Yes, you are."

Serena pulled her hand away from Nate, and stand up. " No, I'm not. All I can do is hurt you." Serena raised her voice a little. " I hurt you when I left after the Shepherd wedding. I hurt you when I told you I didn't come back for you. I hurt you when I rather used you to be my fake boyfriend. I hurt you every time."

Nate tried to sit up in his bed. " You can hurt me because I care a lot about you. I love you. It won't matter that much if it's not because you."

" You always do that to me."

" What?"

" Comforting me. Make excuses for my mistake."

" Serena– " Nate hands out his hands to her.

" But this is my fault. Because of me, you feel guilty to Vanessa. It's all because of me."

" Yes, I feel very guilty. But this is all my fault, not yours. I made a mistake. I like Vanessa. She's fun. She didn't know who Nate Archibald is. You know that sometimes I hate being a Van Der Bilt. When I was with her, I can be a normal guy. Average guy. Not Nate Archibald from the Van Der Bilt clan. But that can't be a foundation to starts a relationship with her. I shouldn't involved with her when I know that my heart is always belong to you. And I shouldn't hide my feelings to Dan from the beginning. You have nothing to do with this. This is not your fault. I'm the one that chose this, Serena. I chose you."

Serena walked closer to him, so he could reached out her hand.

" I just want to be honest with myself for once. I just want to love you without thinking about anything else."

" Nate – " Serena sat in his bed.

" Serena, I love you."

She smiled as she said, " I love you too." Nate wrap her with his right hand as she leaning closer to him in his chest. They only have think about each other right now so they don't realize Blair and Chuck smiled in their sleep as they shifted closer to each other.

* * *

Author's note : Just one more chapter to wrap this story. I will update them as fast as I could.

Thanks for reading. I hope you guys enjoy it.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclamer : I don't own Gossip Girl...

Author's note : This chapter is my last chapter. I hope you enjoy reading this story.

* * *

_**How is getting shot become a lucky thing? Ask it to Nate Archibald. The news said N was getting better. But why S hasn't leave the hospital? Is she plans to move to the hospital? Or she doesn't want to leave her prince charming alone. The latest news is they're officially together. He gets the girl. Congratulation is in order for our new couple. So for summary, N was shot and has a hole in his chest, but unscathed's lonely boy get a broken heart. Which is worst? Feel free to decide yourself.**_

_**You know you love me**_

_**XOXO, Gossip Girl**_

Since Nate admitted to the hospital, they all stayed with him. They practically moved into the hospital. They just went home for a few hours a day, except for Serena. She leave Nate's side since the first day.

" You can't do that, Chuck. That's cheating!" Nate pouting as he pushed the buttons on the PSP, that Chuck brought for him. Chuck is hold the same thing. They play against each other in the pool game.

" Come on, Nathaniel. You were wounded, doesn't mean that I'm going to threw a game for you." Chuck smirked at him.

" You smell. You should go home, S." Blair stood behind her when Serena was peeling an apple for Nate.

Serena turned to Blair. " I didn't smell that bad, right?" The guys stopped playing and watching the girls.

" Yes, you are. This is ridiculous, S. You should go home. Take a bath. At least changed your clothes."

" But – "

Blair took a knife and an apple from Serena. " Chuck will take you home. I'll take care of Nate here."

Nate smirked at Blair. " You'll take care of me? I prefer the nurse."

Blair ignored Nate. " Come on, S. Don't worry. I promise he'll still in one piece when you return."

Nate turned to Serena. " You should go home, Serena. I'm fine. You can leave me for a while."

She looked at Nate. Nate smiled sincerely at her. " Okay, then. B, don't forget he must take his medicine." Serena sat up from her chair and walked to the door as Chuck lazily sat up from the couch.

" I know, S. There is a nurse in here, you know." Blair stated the obvious.

" And give him a drink every half hour. He needed fluids."

Blair turned to Chuck. " Get her out of here."

Chuck obey Blair's order and wrapped his arm in Serena's shoulders. " Come on, sis. Blair is the boss of us all."

Chuck take Serena to his suite, because she practically live there at the moment. When Serena come out from the bathroom in her bathrobe, Chuck was sitting in her bed.

" I've taken all of the clothes that left by Nate here." Chuck said, pointing to one bag in the floor.

Serena saw a glimpse of the bag as she dried her wet hair with a towel. " He has a lot of clothes here. He didn't even live here"

" He is. At least this couple of weeks – since you live here."

Serena turned to Chuck. " You want to say something. Just say it."

Chuck raised his hands. " I didn't say a word."

" But you want to. Come on, Chuck. Just spill it." Serena stood in front of Chuck. Her eyes demanding an answer from him.

" Fine. You're asking me. It isn't me who wants to interfere in the problem between the two of you." Serena just stood still, stared at him. " Blair told me." Serena knew what Blair told Chuck about. " He just threw his life to save you. Are you still afraid that he'll hurt you?"

Serena sat next to Chuck. " I know that he won't hurt me. I don't know why I can think like that in the first place. He's Nate. He'll never hurt me. He was always put my interests above all, even his."

" So what's stopping you?"

" He's a wonderful guy, Chuck. I don't deserve him. I'm not good enough for him. He has done everything for me. But in the end, I'll hurt him. It was always like that. I don't want to, but I keep hurt him."

Chuck shifted Serena's body to face him. " Then, this is your turn to try. Try not to hurt him. He has done everything for you. The least that you can do is try. Prove it that you good enough for him. He has faith in you. That's why he loves you so much. You owe it to him to at least try."

Serena locked her gaze in Chuck's eyes. She had never seen Chuck like this before. He wasn't joking with her. He was serious about what he said.

" I'm Chuck Bass. You, Serena Van Der Woodsen won't lose to me in this, right?"

" Chuck – "

" I'm Chuck Bass, Serena. I'm not a good person. But for Blair, I try to be a better person. I love her. And I'll do whatever it takes to make her happy." Chuck grabbed Serena's hand. " Come with me." Chuck pulled Serena to the living room.

She quietly sat on the couch, as Chuck looking for something in the drawer. He took out a scroll of paper and sat next to Serena. He opened the scroll and show it to Serena.

" Right here it's a plan for a new hotel that I've been intend to open. My hotel. The palace is my father's hotel. I want to starts from the beginning."

" That's really good, Chuck."

" Don't tell Blair. I haven't tell her yet. I wanted it to be a surprise."

" You did this for Blair?"

" No. I did it for myself. To be better for Blair. A person that worth of Blair." Chuck turned to Serena. " If I can do it, you can."

Serena smiled at him. She shifted closer to him as she leaning at him. She kissed his cheek. She can feel that Chuck is changed. He's not the same Chuck Bass that she knows when they were little. And she can feel that he really did cared for her. " Thank you, Chuck."

" Anytime, sis." He said as he caressed Serena's back.

* * *

Blair is chasing the same thing with the other side. She stood on the egde of Nate's bed facing him. " Anything you want to tell me?"

" Yes. Give me something to drink?"

" I mean about Serena!" Nate smirked at her. " You both say I love you. At the middle of the night. Chuck and I slept on the couch. Ringing any bells?"

" Appparently not sleeping if you heard that."

Blair ignored Nate's comment. " So, you already talked to Serena'? What she said?" Nate just stared at Blair. She knew what he meant, so she hit Nate's leg.

" Ouch! I'm the patient here. Gunshot wound."

" Don't be such a baby. It's on your shoulder." Blair walked to Nate's side and sat on the chair. " You know how Serena is. If you're not talk about this soon, she would pretend that it never happened."

Nate just smiled at her. " I know."

" So why you haven't talked to her about that?"

Nate sighed. " We're in a good place right now, Blair. When I decided to tell my feeling to her, I haven't really thought about it. I don't know what I want from this. This is the end of the road. One way or the other. Either she'll accept me. Or I'm going to lose her. I'm not ready for that, Blair. I'm afraid."

" You'll never lose her, Nate." Blair said, almost sound like a whisper, but Nate heard that.

Nate turned to Blair. " No matter what happen, we'll have each other's back. So stop worried so much. Just talk to her."

Nate nodded to her in a smile. " You're right. What am I thinking? This is just us." Nate thinking about all that happened to them. He had sex with Serena when he still Blair's boyfriend. Blair and Chuck sneaked around behind Nate's back. But they are still together until now. They're still best friends. Because of that, Nate have a faith that they can get through anything.

" Am I interrupting something?" Dan suddenly showed up. He stood in the doorway. Blair and Nate turned to him.

" You always interrupting, Humphrey." Blair exchanged glance with Nate. Then she gets up from her chair and grabbed the jug from the bedside table. " I'll refill the water." She walked toward the door and stepped out of the room.

Dan just move one step from the door. " How are you?"

" I've been better." An awkward silence for a moment. " Thanks for helping me."

" No problem."

Silence again. " I tried to call you several times." Hear that makes Dan moved closer to Nate. " But I didn't. I don't know if you want to take my calls."

" It's good that you don't called. I don't know whether I want to answer it or not. I don't even know why I come here right now." Dan walked again closer to Nate.

" I'm so sorry, Dan. You've become a good friend to me. You accepted me in your house when I need a place to stay. When I was too proud to tell my friends about that. I shouldn't hide my feeling for Serena from you."

" I never asked." Dan leaned againts the wall, but his eyes looked at Nate. " It's not entirely your fault. I never really understand your relationship with Serena." Dan laughed bitterly. " No. Not just between you and Serena. But all of you. There's always all of you between me and Serena." Dan rubbed his head. " Vanessa and I also been friends since childhood. But we don't depend on each other like you are."

" We come from the upper east side. Everyone thinks that we have it all. And we almost are. But there's one thing we didn't have. We don't have a perfect family like you are. We just have each other. Serena, Chuck and Blair. They're my family." Nate lifted his face and looked at Dan. " They aren't just my friend. I'm not try to justify what I do. I know it doesn't make it okay. But I'm not trying to hurt you. I really love her."

Dan sighed. " I know you are a good guy. And I know how serious you are to Serena. Maybe my feelings to Serena won't be comparable with your feelings to her. You've loved her all your life. How can I compete with that? But I still wouldn't let her go. Because I also loved her. I didn't lose to you for that matter."

" Me too, Dan. When it comes to Serena, I also can't let go."

Oddly, Dan smiled when he heard Nate's words. " Let us compete fairly, then."

Nate also smiled and he nodded. He hands out his hand to Dan. " Whoever chosen by Serena, it will not affect our friendship. I really value a friend like you."

Dan shook Nate's hand. " Deal." After that they both laughed together. That's when Serena came back with Chuck.

They both stood in the doorway, watching Dan and Nate. " What have I missed?" Serena asked with a puzzled look in her face. Just was yesterday Dan hitting Nate in front of the Palace. And now they laugh together.

" Where is Blair?" Chuck ignores their conversation. He felt uncomfortable being in between them.

" She went to fill the water." Nate said to Chuck. Chuck promptly left them. Serena walked into the room. She watched them both. They know she wants an answer.

" We simply decided that whatever happened between us, we'll stay friend." Nate is the one that explained to Serena.

Dan turned to Serena. " Can we talk now?"

Serena saw Nate at a glance, then looked Dan. " Could you do a rain check? There's something I have to say to Nate."

Dan nodded and walked up to Serena. " Call me." Dan kiss Serena on the cheek, then he walked out from the room.

Serena closed the door and locked it. " Before Blair and Chuck come back here." Then she sat on the chair beside Nate's bed.

" Am I need to feel nervous with what you want to say?" Serena could see the concern in Nate's eyes. It made her smile. But see her smiled, making Nate more anxious. " Could I say something first?"

" No." Serena hurriedly replied. " You've said many things before. Now is my turn to say something."

Nate justify his seat and looking Serena in the eyes. " Okay. I'm ready. Just say it."

Now it Serena's turn to feel nervous. She took a deep breath. " I love you." Because he was too surprised by Serena's words, Nate couldn't even say anything. He just stared at Serena in silence. " It feels good to say it." Serena smiled at him.

" Actually I've always felt that I love you. But I never did anything about it. I'm afraid you'll hurt me." Nate was going to say something, but Serena doesn't let him. " I know you won't. But that's what I thought that time. When my dad left, he hurt me very deeply. I don't know if I can survive it if I got hurt again."

" But now you'll already know that I'll never hurt you, right?" Serena nodded with a little smile.

" Now I'm afraid I'll hurt you. I'm me. I'm not a good girl. But you are a good man. I'm not worthy of you."

" Serena." Nate raised his hand to reach Serena's hand.

" I'm afraid if you know the real me, you won't want me anymore." Serena looked at Nate. " But you know me. Even more than I know myself. And you still love me."

Nate gently pulled Serena's hand, headed to his bed. When Serena was sitting on his bed, Nate slowly put his arm around her waist. " Yes, I still love you. And you too underestimate yourself." Nate gently stroked Serena's cheek. " You are the most beautiful, amazing, alive person I ever known. It's so easy for me to fall in love with you."

Serena put her arm in Nate's neck. She was careful not to touch the wound. " Only you who think like that about me." Serena slowly leaned on Nate. " I'll try to become a better person for you. I'm very scared to want you. But I also want to be honest with myself and to you. I want you."

Serena snuggled closer to Nate. Serena kissed him at the edge of his lips. Nate closer his eyes and hugged her. They hugged each other in silence for a while. Then Serena pulled away. She looked at Nate with smile in her face.

" Let's try this. You and me."

" Are you sure? You don't have to force yourself. I'm not going anywhere."

Serena just smiled. She lay in his bed, then pulling him with her. She put her head in his shoulder and buried her fingers in his hair with gently caress. " I've never been so sure. I never had the courage to admit my feelings like this before. I love you, Nate. I'll give my best shot to make you happy."

Nate's hand slipped up and down in her back with slow caress. " I'm already happy." Nate kissed her nose. " You love me."

Serena looked Nate straight in the eyes. Her heart is overflowing with happiness. She shifted closer to Nate and kissed him with a passionate kiss. Nate slowly pulled back after the kiss. He breathed heavily. She could see his eyes was full of desire. Serena smiled softly at him, then pulled him back for another kiss. Serena could feel that he smile when he kissed her.

" You're so beautiful." He whispered as he kissed her. She just smiled, and snuggled closer to Nate as they keep kissing each other. They felt never been happier. They could feel at this time that they were finally in the same place with the same feeling toward each other.

* * *

Serena has just opened the door, Blair immediately burst into the room. Chuck is trailed behind her. Blair stood watching Nate and Serena. Nate's hair looked a mess. Serena's face flushed. They seems to be careful in looking each other.

" Do you think you two are being discreet? The hospital walls aren't too thick. And you both sounded very loud. The nurses are very curious."

" Well done. I'm so proud of you, Nathaniel." Chuck also added, as he smirked at his best friend.

They didn't say anything. They didn't confirm or deny it. Nate silent in his bed. Serena also stood silently. But their faces is getting red.

Blair closed the door behind her and approached Nate. " Just out of curiosity. How exactly you did that? The bed is very small. And you were wounded."

" Blair!" Serena shouted at her.

" You said there's no secret between us."

" It doesn't include our sex life. That was obviously confidential." Serena shouted at Blair. Nate coughed nervously.

" So you two really have a sex life." Blair sound pleased.

Serena face's getting more blushed. " Fine. We had sex. Are you happy now?" Nate is the one that admits it all.

Chuck smirked and walked closer to them. " We already know that you two had sex. We can all hear it. That's not the question."

" Yes. Are we become a foursome now?" Blair asked the question.

" Please don't call us that." Serena shook her head.

" Fine. I'll just be blunt. Are you two a couple now?" Blair asked again.

Serena and Nate looked at each other silently then smiled. Serena walked to Nate. They didn't say anything, instead Nate's hand reached for Serena's and their fingers intertwined. Blair and Chuck also don't need answer anymore.

Suddenly the door opened. " What happened in here?" Lily and Rufus come into the room.

" Mom."

" We haven't had a chance to see Nate." Lily stepped in from the door. Rufus followed next to her.

" Why are you all doing here?" Rufus asked. Nate placed in VIP room that is big enough. But right now this room seemed cramped because of the crowd.

" He is our best friend. And Serena's new boyfriend." Blair volunteered to tell them the latest news.

Lily and Rufus seemed surprised to hear the news. Lily turned to Serena. " Is that true, Serena? You and Nate together?" But they also don't need answer for their own question. They get their answer when they see Serena and Nate hold each other hand.

" What about you and Dan?" This time is Rufus who asked the question.

Serena turned to Rufus. " I understand that you're concerned with our problems. But after what happened, I think it's too complicated. We're shared a sibling. That's way too much."

Lily and Rufus changed glance with each other. " But he was dead. He isn't in this world anymore."

Now it's Serena and Nate's turn to changed glance with each other. Nate knows the only reason Serena break up with Dan is because they shared a brother. But if that brother doesn't exist anymore, there is no reason for them to break up.

* * *

Serena quietly flipped the page from the magazine as she kept looking at her watch. Nate was playing the PSP. But he also saw how uncomfortable Serena is. So he put down the PSP and turned to Serena.

" You better go home."

Serena raised her head and looked at Nate. " What?"

" You have appointment with Dan right?"

" It isn't within a few hours."

" But your mind isn't here anymore. You should use this time to think about it carefully. Figure things out with Dan."

" Nate." Serena sat up and walked to Nate.

" I can see through you, Serena. You don't have to hide anything from me." Nate reached Serena's hand.

" I don't want to hurt you. We've just agreed to start a relationship. A real one. And this."

Nate gently pulled Serena's hand, so she sat in his bed. " I said it before. Don't worry, because I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be here whenever you need me." Nate smiled at her. " As a boyfriend is okay. But as a friend is also okay." He wrapped his hand around her. " I'll always be your friend, Serena. My shoulder is always available for you to leaned on."

Serena hugged Nate, carefully not to touch his wound. " Thank you. I don't know what to say other than that."

Nate caressed her cheek as he smiled at her. " Go." Nate gently said to her.

Serena kissed his cheek lightly before she pulled away. " I'll see you later." Nate just nodded. Then she walked out from his room.

" That is the dumbest thing you've ever done." Suddenly Chuck appeared. He just stood in the door. " After all that had happened, you'll let her back to Humphrey just like that?"

" I didn't let her to do anything. She is free to make her own choice. I won't force her to do anything."

" So you will be okay if she chose him?"

" Of course I won't be okay. But if she's happy, I will be happy for her."

Chuck shook his head. " That is a serious disease that you have there, Nathaniel." Chuck walked into the room. " I've told you, you don't have to be the good guy all the time. This is the time for you not to be the good guy." Chuck walked closer to Nate. " Serena isn't like other girls. She has her issues. We all know that. You have to work hard for her. And you did. Don't stop now."

" Chuck –" Nate just wanted to say something, but Chuck raised his hand to prevent him from it.

" I'm Chuck Bass. I don't do touchy feely. But you are my best friend. And you make a huge mistake. This is your shot. You probably won't get a chance like this again. And you've waited this moment your whole life."

Nate just silently absorb what was Chuck said to him. Before he can think about it, his hand had pulled the wires in his other hand. Nate turned to Chuck. " Help me."

* * *

Serena just walked into the apartement when the doorbell rang. She hadn't even had time to put her bag. She opened the door. Dan stood in front of the door.

" Dan?" Serena looked at her watch at reflexes. " We have appointment at six." Serena points a clock behind her which is still showing 3 o'clock.

" You are here. What's the difference." Serena steps aside to let Dan come in. " Why we have to meet in Chuck's suite?"

" Because I live here now." Serena closed the door. " Do you want anything to drink?"

" I didn't come here to drink." Dan turned to Serena.

Serena knew she couldn't put it off again. She sighed. " There is no easy way to say this. Our brother. He was dead."

" Wow."

" Yeah."

Dan sat on the couch. Dan was silent for a while. Then he looked at Serena. " This should make me happy. Because that's meant there is no reason for us to break up anymore."

Dan turned to Serena. "I believe you that when you decide to break up with me, it has nothing to do with Nate. But now – is all about Nate." Serena sat next to Dan.

" I'm so sorry, Dan. I shouldn't had sex with him when I'm still in relationship with you no matter how drunk we were."

" This was also my fault." Serena looked at Dan. " I knew. Your relationship with Nate are different. I can see it. But I just ignore it. You chose me."

" I really did love you."

" But you love Nate more."

" I never know what I feel for Nate. I always kept it buried. Because I was afraid if our relationship doesn't work out, I will lose him. I can't lose him. He's – " Serena stopped to think of Nate. " He's not just my best friend. He's Nate. He's the guy that always stood beside me through anything. My dad left. My mom married five times. It's not easy. But it doesn't matter. Because I have him. He's just – "

" There." Serena turned to Dan. " You used to. He was there. You used to leaned on him. That how important he is to you."

Dan see Serena deeply. " You've loved him for your whole life." Serena didn't say anything. She doesn't know how to respond to Dan's words.

But even if Serena doesn't say anything, Dan already understand. He could see how important Nate to Serena and vice versa. He smiled sincerely. " I understand." Now his smile looked sad. " I've come too late."

Hearing it brought tears welled in Serena's eyes. She felt very guilty to Dan. " I'm really sorry, Dan. I never meant to hurt you."

Dan raised his hand and brushed Serena's hand. " I know."

" But I hurt you. I'm sorry."

Dan shook his head. " Don't apologize, Serena. You love Nate. That is the reality. And you aren't guilty because of love." Dan pulling his hand again. " I just hope you choose other guy, not Nate." Serena looked at Dan. " Nate was a good guy. And I liked him. Would be difficult for me to hate him. " Dan said with a smile.

Dan stood up. " I'd better go now." Serena was stand too. " Don't worry. I'll be fine.." Dan seeing how Serena felt so guilty at him. " Someday I'll be able to see you as a family. As my sister."

That words make Serena's tears fell down to her cheeks. Dan smiled softly at her, and wiped the tears on her cheeks. " It's OK, Serena. I already told you. Don't feel guilty for loving Nate. Love him bravely. He sacrificed everything for you, even his own life. I feel proud to ever beat a guy like that once."

Dan hugged Serena. Serena was hugging her back. " Good-bye, Serena." Serena knows what is Dan meant is goodbye to their relationship. Their relationship has really ended up here.

Dan pulling himself. He thrust his face on Serena's face and kissed her lips softly. Dan stroked Serena's face at glance before he turned and walked out of Chuck's suite.

Serena sat down again on the couch after Dan leave. She allowed herself to cry. Getting out everything in her heart. However, he ever loved Dan.

Once Serena wiped her tears, the doorbell rang again. She quickly cleaned her face. Then open the door. Nate stood in the doorway.

" Nate!" Serena's face looked surprised to see Nate standing in front of her. " What are you doing here?" Serena rushed up to him. Nate's face looks wet with sweat.

" I –" Nate is so difficult to speak because he was still panting. It's very visible that Nate's been running.

Serena leads Nate to went in and told him to sit on the couch, while Serena fetching drinks for him. After drinking, Nate's breath began sound regularly again.

" Wow. I just realized how far away the hospital from here."

Serena stared at Nate with shocked faces. " You ran from the hospital to here?"

" I can't find where Finn is." Finn is the driver of Chuck's limousin. " I'm afraid too late."

" Too late for what?" Serena sat next to Nate.

Nate turned around and face Serena. " Serena, I'm trying to be a better person. Heartened to let you choose without having to bother about me. But I can't." Serena looked at Nate." Since little I already sure you are the girl of my dreams. I don't want to let you go just like that. I don't want to give up on you yet." Nate grabbed Serena's hand and hold it tightly. " I love you, Serena. I've loved you since little. And will always love you. I will never change forever."

Serena smiled and hugged Nate. " I admit when mom and Rufus told me about our brother, I hesitated." Serena pulled away and looked at Nate deeply in the eyes. " But not about my feelings to you. Now I know clearly who I loved. I love you, Nate. And I'm not afraid anymore to admit it." Serena stroked Nate's cheek. "I just feel guilty at Dan."

Serena smiled at Nate. " It will be difficult. But we'll get through it."

" So everything is already finished? Between you and Dan?" Nate asked. Serena nodded.

" Just you and me now."

Nate smiled at Serena. Nate shifted closer to Serena. Their eyes stared at each other. Their lips stay an inch away from each other. But Serena suddenly withdrew herself.

" What about Vanessa?"

" I've talked to her. I've explained everything." Nate stroked Serena's cheek. " It's you. It's always been you." Serena smiled and leaned her head close to his. Their forehead touched.

" You too, Nate. It's always been you." Serena said, before to kiss him. " You like an air to me, Nate. I can't do anything without you."

The kiss wasn't start like the soft one. Serena wanted him for so long and now she couldn't release him so easily. Nate pressed her body closer to him. He tried to calm her down and she finally gave up. Her lips became softer and her fingers in his hair more gentle. They pulled back without any air, but giggling at each other.

Suddenly the doorbell rang again. Serena pulled herself from Nate annoyed and stood up. " Who else is this?" Nate just giggled, amused.

Serena opened the door. She saw the Chuck and Blair stood in the doorway. " Sis, this is my home. You lock me from my own home?"

" We're kind of having a private activity here." Serena said, pointing at Nate who waved his hand.

" You must hurry to find your own place. I'm not going to rent out my suite to be a brothel." Chuck said, as he stepped into the suite. Blair trailed behind him.

" What are you doing here?" Serena asked, as she closed the door.

" Where else we can be. Nate out of the hospital. And you're here." Blair saw Serena and Nate carefully. " I guess Dan's things are finished?"

Serena smiled happily and sat back in Nate's side. She grabbed Nate's hand and they were holding hands. " We're okay now." Serena said as she exchanged smiles with Nate.

Blair was throwing his hand on Chuck's arm. " Don't worry. The hard part was passed."

Serena looked up and stared at Blair. " What do you mean?"

Blair exchanged smiles with Chuck. " Everything will be easy for us. We've known them our whole lives." Serena also exchanged gaze with Nate. They smiled at each other. At this moment they feel there is nothing they can't get through because they are together. It supposed to be like this since the beginning. The four of them. The Non Judging Breakfast Club.

* * *

Fin.


End file.
